Patch Work
by Jane Opries
Summary: This is a short story. Ava Lene left with her mother years ago after the inn fire. Now with Vivian's wedding coming up, she heads home for her cousin's nuptials. She must face what she left behind, especially her hurt father and hopeless ex-husband. Can she forget what had happened in the past and come home?
1. Return home

**Oh my, my, my. Here I am again and I am sad to see that this book does not get more love. What I am planning is a short story, only like 5 chaps long. This will have cannon characters in it but also a few OC's. Don't worry, I won't slaughter some thing so wonderful.**

**First thing: I am going to make Bucky a stray that was found by Rudy and when Esme marries Ivan, he goes with them, and that is how he joined Vivian's pack. Rudy has a daughter, who is 21, who left with her mother to go live at Ivan and Esme's inn. We will go into that more during the story. **

**This is a year after the book.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Blood and Chocolate, nor any of the characters. This is strictly fan written.**

**Well enjoy.**

**-Jane**

* * *

_Three years since I had seen daddy. Three since I had seen my now ex-husband, almost four; it felt weird to be going back toward that side of the country to see people who didn't care if I was alive._

_It was all because my cousin was to be married in a week and I was invited. I don't know how they found me but they always do and I get conned into these things. At least Vivian waited till she was 18. I wish I had done so as well, then maybe my marriage wouldn't have failed._

_My father, Rudy, had sent for me a long time ago, when the pack was still in Maryland, but I didn't go back. I couldn't go back. Not with my mother already dying and me being the only reason she hadn't pulled the trigger sooner. I don't know what made her think that was the only way to escape her demons, but I know she doesn't suffer any more._

_I clenched my right hand with my left, feeling my knuckles press together, causing slight pain with the pressure and I inhaled deeply; the smell of sweat and plastic filled my nostrils. Loup garaou didn't fly. This was ludicris._

* * *

It didn't matter either way, Ava Lene was going back to her pack, despite all the protests going on in her head. She didn't want to see those faces again. She didn't want to think about the faces that wouldn't be there. The fire seemed to have eaten all she knew.

She knew as well that she wouldn't be referred to as Avie by her father and she could feel the dread of being called Ava Lene by her family. What a dreadful name. Her mother really must have hated her.

Her long, dark hair was flung over one shoulder and she constantly played with her ends that needed to be cut. _I'll do it when I come back home, _she thought bitterly. Really, and in full truth, she didn't have a home.

The random and swift pang in her chest hit her as she remembered that she would be alone on this venture, her mother no longer here to protect her from her aunt's constant teasing, her father's saddened talks, and her ex-husband's pleas for her to come back. She was 21 for Moon's sake, she didn't need people to give her life speeches or tell her what she needed. She had done fine for the past three (almost four) years.

The seat belt light came on and the chime snapped Ava out of her thoughts, noticing her plane was about to land and she did not look forward to the humidity. That was the great part about Canada, it wasn't so hot and humid. She could just imagine how her wavy hair was about to become a frizzy mess.

"Thank you for flying with us today, we hope you travel safe and have a wonderful stay." A generic female voice said over the intercom speakers.

Finally, she could touch land.

* * *

"You're twitching, brother."

Rudy looked at his sister and looked down to see his finger was indeed moving in an odd manor. Esme put her hand on his shoulder and smile sympathetically. She knew he was nervous to see his grown child now after three years. The poor girl had just lost her mother and it was time to get her away. With Vivian getting married, she thought it would be good for both Ava Lene and Rudy to see each other again. She knew the girl would fight it but it was more for her father than her.

"I told Bucky. She'll be angry at me." He sighed. His tired blue eyes seemed to drag upwards. "More so than she already is."

"She'll get over it or I'll make her." Esme tossed her golden hair over her shoulder. All these people made her skin crawl.

They both became alert when the board announced the arrival of the plane Ava Lene was on. Rudy could feel his blood pounding in his ears. Damn his sister and her want to make the family whole once more. He loved his daughter but he could already tell it was a bad idea to ask her to come back. She would be miserable and sad. Her cousin even protested her return and the invitation to her wedding. She only agreed when Esme said it was for Uncle Rudy.

Esme sighed when a short girl with long waves appeared out of the crowd and was walking straight toward them, pulling one luggage behind her. She didn't look any thing like when she lived with the pack. Her mother must have taken Ava Lene with her when she died. She was much thinner and it looked like she never got sun. Her bright blue eyes had lost their luster to them and now dully looked around as if waiting for some one to shoot her.

The girl came to a stop and gave an awkward smile, unsure of what to say. "Hello, Aunt Esme...daddy."

Esme hugged the girl quickly and Rudy tried to do his best and give her a real hug but she only patted his arm and blinked in surprise. "Hello baby, how was the flight?" He asked when he stepped back and cleared his throat.

She rubbed her back and shrugged. "It was ok. Long, but nothing happened."

Esme already had her bag and gently took her arm. "Well I guess then we should start back. We live in the middle of no where and its wonderful. You'll like it." She acted like the girl wasn't being so stand offish with them. Maybe if they treated her like she never left, it would help. "And you should see Vivian's wedding dress."

"I bet it's pretty." She muttered and sniffed with as much enthusiasm as she could muster. "I bet she is excited."

Esme smiled and continued dragging her to the car. Rudy walked only a few paces behind them and she could tell he was sad about how his daughter was acting. Maybe seeing the pack would help. She could only hope.

* * *

She didn't want to admit it, but her aunt was right. She did love the inn.

It was tall and white and it had a wrap around porch that she knew her ex-husband had built. She only prayed she didn't see him right away. The small parking lot was only half full and she could tell that the inn had minimal guests in it since the wedding was this week. Soon they would be all gone and the pack would celebrate the marriage of their alphas.

_Vivian an alpha. What a big surprise. _Ava watched as a few boys were putting some thing together over by a barn, were she could see part of a corral and a head of a horse. The car stopped and Ava felt her heart drop.

Esme hopped out and waved down to the boys which Ava instantly knew were what was left of the Five. She knew about Axel and Rafe. It made her even more sad. Rafe used to be a good kid. It's to bad that the animal got the best of him.

Rudy stepped out and opened Ava's door and motioned to the large inn. "Welcome back. We have a room for you up stairs. We were gonna put you in an cabin but one of the pack member's bought it and is living in it.

She slowly removed herself from the car and she could hear the boys calling back at Esme. They knew Ava, but she wasn't sure if she would be happy to see them.

"They said that Reneta and Jenny have food cooking in the kitchen, are you hungry?" Esme popped the trunk and removed her bag. Ava shook her head and patted her stomach.

"No, I ate before I left Denver and the plane made me a little sick." She lied. She was starving, but she wasn't ready to face everyone right now. Maybe she would miss them till tomorrow.

Esme shrugged and handed off the bag to Ava. The whoops and hollers of the boys made them turn and just in time for Finn to skid to a stop and come nose to nose with Ava. "Hey Avie. When did you become such a babe?"

Williem rolled his eyes and Ulf giggle slightly. She raised her eyebrow and scoffed. "When did you become a lap dog? Can you get out of my face please." Yes, she was sure she hadn't miss Finn, at least.

He smirked and stepped back. "Still fiesty. Yup, she is still Avie."

Gregory gave her a half hug and laughed. "Well, its about damn time you came back. Did you miss us?"

Before Ava could tell the boys to quit touching her and to leave her be, Rudy cleared his throat and Greg's arm dropped. "Let her get settled and then you can harass her."

_Thanks dad._ She wanted to growl. She settled for biting the inside of her cheek.

She followed Esme and Rudy into the inn and found it quite charming. It was vintage, but not run down. Anything that had wood was polished and the chairs seemed to have never been sat in, though she knew that was not true. A girl she didn't recognize greeted her and Rudy waved back in acknowledgement. They headed toward a flight of stairs and then made their way up to the top floor, which to Ava's despair, was quiet a ways up.

Esme parted away from them when her floor came and said she had to check up on some thing. She had no idea what, but Ava decided she didn't care. She just wanted to get the smell of human and airport off of her.

When Rudy stopped and pulled a key from his back pocket, Ava let go a sigh of relief. He smiled at her. "I know you are tired. I made sure you got a good sized room. It has some clothes in there that you left at my house."

She wondered about her father's large Victorian house. She had fond memories there. "You still live there or here?"

He had to jiggle the door knob a bit but the door opened and he smiled back at her. "I still live there. I have a good life there, I didn't want to move around again. Getting to old for that."

She didn't think so, but then again, he was reaching 50. His hair had greyed more and his skin was less defined. He was past his prime. He stepped back and held his arm out, inviting her in. She walked past him and walked into the room. It was very home like. Quilts were on the bed, a wardrobe was artistically placed in a corner along with a vanity and large bed. The bathroom door was open and Ava could see that there was a large ceramic tub that was deep. That was what she wanted. The only thing that unnerved her is that the vanity used to be her mother's and her scent was wafting in the room.

"Thanks dad, its nice." She nodded at him.

He rubbed his palms on his jeans and back towards the door. "Well, I'm glad you like it." He turned and grabbed the door knob. "I'm glad you came back Avie." He shut the door.

She only wanted a few more moments before rushing to the bathroom, her toiletry bag in her hand, leaving behind crumpled clothes on the floor in a trail. She turned on the water at its highest temperature and even though it was humid enough, she sighed in content with the feel of the steam touching her skin. She slowly merged herself into the water and let her body get used to the heat.

"Oh thank the goddess..." She whispered when she found that her little body was thoroughly covered by the water. Her aching back stretched out and her muscles relaxed with the heat.

She could also feel the slight prickle of her fur emerging from her skin. Oh it felt good.

"I'm glad to see you like the tub."

Ava was startled and jumped and covered herself with her arms, only to find her aunt looking at her amused. "You scared me." She shivered, despite the temperature of the water.

"You were really into it." Esme leaned against the door frame and crossed her arms. "So, you finally gave in and came back? You must be really hating it."

She had no idea how right she was and Ava didn't even attempt to deny it. "Its sad to see half the pack gone and I don't want to be to close to...some pack members." She looked away, as if saying his name would shatter her inner being. She still loved him, she always would.

"Bucky knows your here." Esme said, despite when her niece flinched as if she had been hit. "Trust me, he has been shaving and taking baths regularly. He is starting to look like a man again."

"He isn't dating any one?" Ava asked sadly. Surely he hasn't been thinking she'd forget the divorce and get back with him, did he?

Esme laughed humorously. "That man has had lovers, but he will never get committed again unless you reconcile with him. You know, you shouldn't have let your mother talk you into-"

"Please." Ava's voice turned icy and she glared at Esme. "Don't bring her up, please."

Esme raised an elegant brow and then turned away. "Fine, have it your way. You know, you are here for a while. Why do you set things right with your dad and forgotten ex-husband?" Ava heard the door close to the room and she rested her forehead against her knees.

"He is never forgotten." She said to the water.

* * *

**Yay or nay? Yes, she was married to Bucky at one time. It will go into more detail. Drop a review and tell me what your thoughts were.**


	2. Preventing a melt down

**Disclaimer: I do not own Blood and Chocolate, nor any of the characters. This is strictly fan written.**

**Well enjoy.**

**-Jane**

* * *

Ava only sat in the bath a few more moments before she decided after all that she would eat. Her naked body had turned pink from the heat of the water and she felt like she was being born again as she slipped out of the water and pulled the towel tight around her, as if some one would see her.

Her kind had never had a problem with nudity. It was hard to be in your fur with a shirt and pants. When she lived with her father, she remembered coming down stairs for breakfast and seeing her aunt Esme, stark naked and mud smeared across her skin, casually pouring coffee for her and her father. It was never a big deal. But since she had left, she felt like both her forms had become dirty and had to be hidden.

She stood by a fan in her room and felt the water dry and it helped cool her a bit. It was growing dark but that didn't mean that the heavy heat would go with the sun. It lingered until midnight. She stretched her body and brushed her hair, before giving in to clothes. She usually covered up, but she went and bought several shorts and tee shirts for this heat and decided that a grey v-neck and some white shorts would do. She forgot her shoes and lightly stepped down the stairs toward the back of the inn.

The pack rarely ate indoors. They only resorted to that if it was raining or to cool out, but given the weather, she knew they would pull out tables to the soft grass and eat there. Their few guests would opt for staying in the air conditioning.

They had strung lanterns around the porch and little moths fluttered around them, lost in the light. The crickets were cheerfully chirping away.

_Esme made roast beef. _She could smell it and her teeth grew pointy at the thought of meat. Her aunt made a mean roast. She followed the sounds of the pack and turned the corner, barely missing a porch swing with three little girls sitting on it, giggling and their food forgotten.

The pack grew quieter as they stopped eating to see if it was true. Rudy's girl was back. Most hadn't seen her since she started crawling. The Five waved their arms and Finn blew a kiss, which she ignored. She was surprised to see Vivian next to Esme and pleasantly, inherited all the good things from her parents. Next to her was a large man with dark hair that she knew was Gabriel. My, was he handsome. Her cousin chose well.

After a while the others went back to their eating, gossip, banter, and conversation blending together to make inaudible noise. Finally, her eyes landed on the broad shoulders that once carried her. Bucky sat next to Rudy across from Gabriel and Vivian, talking to a man that was by Esme's side. She felt her heart beat quicken and her tongue grow useless. She wasn't ready for this.

She grabbed a paper plate and walked down the table, taking in as much as her plate could allow. She'd run it off later.

She came down the short flight of stairs and stood next to her father, who smiled up and her and cleared a spot for her, right next to Bucky. _Thank you daddy, how sweet. _Bucky's scent wafted up into her nostrils and her toes curled in delight. He always did this to her.

She could feel Vivian's glare on her as she sat down, her leg bumping Bucky's and stopped him in mid sentence to glance over, making him look twice. His eyes bore into her face and she nodded at her aunt and waved at Vivian, who held up two fingers in recognition, her large diamond ring sparkling.

Before any one could say anything, Esme spoke up. "I thought you weren't hungry, baby."

Ava shrugged and smiled at her aunt. "I smelt roast beef. I was sold."

Esme giggled and pointed at Vivian, her proud mate chuckling as well. "Well, I didn't make it. The little shit decided that she needed to learn how to cook, since she will be a married woman soon."

Ava smiled at Vivian. "It smells delicious."

It was delicious too. Despite her shaking hands and Bucky's constant stares, she wasn't sure that she was going to make it through dinner, but the meat was so tender and it had enough blood in it to satisfy her inner wolf.

"So, how was your flight?" It took her a moment to realize her former mate was talking to her but she recovered quickly and responded when Gabriel asked it again, as if she didn't hear.

"Long, but no problems. I sat next to a baby on the way to Denver. She had colic and screamed." She could almost still hear the poor thing. Her mother should have been more sensitive to her child's needs and not flown with her not so well.

Esme stuck out her lip and looked at the man at her side, who she learned was Esme's boyfriend Tomas. "Poor baby. I lucked out, my kid never got sick."

Rudy rolled his eyes and looked at Ava with a twinkle in his eye. "Mine always pretended to be sick."

Ava puffed up and looked her father straight in the face. "Then maybe you should have home schooled me and I wouldn't have had to pretend to be sick to get away from those idiots."

He laughed and turned away, saying some thing to Gabriel and Vivian and Ava returned to her food. Bucky moved next to her and she decided to look at him finally. He had aged. He wasn't that old in the first place, soon to be thirty, but his eyes seemed to hold no more youth, his chiseled face seemed to be tired and the knot of scars on his throat made her eyes widen. They looked awful and she wanted to touch them and keep looking at them.

Bucky heard her gasp and looked at her, light green meeting light blue. She blinked a couple of times before she started to feel the blood rush to her face and her ears. Damn him, why did he have such a power over her.

"How long are you here?" He asked. His voice was husky and a tad hoarse and his lips parted slightly.

She felt like she was a deer in headlights. She mentally slapped herself and inhaled deeply. "Until the day after the wedding."

His face grew a smug smile and he nodded. "Yeah? Why not stay here?" He used his hand to motion to the inn and its surroundings. "You can work in the kitchen, I have a house now. I bet, you will be happier here."

_Oh sweet moon...he doesn't think its over. _"Bucky, I don't live here any more. We are divorced...I can't stay here." She said quietly. She could still faintly hear a conversation going on next to her. She silently pleaded for some one to talk to her.

"I never signed those papers, so no we are not." He sounded to hopeful and it killed Ava.

"Bucky." A stern voice snapped them both away from each other and looked over to see Vivian looking at him with pity. "She doesn't care for us, let her go."

"Vivian!" Esme gasped and Rudy put his hand on his daughter's shoulder. Gabriel sighed and looked at Rudy with a hard mouth. Apparently, Vivian had said what they all thought and they wanted to keep it a secret.

Ava felt the rejection from her cousin like cold stones going down her throat. She couldn't tell them, they would never believe her. She shrugged off Rudy's hand and slid from her spot, leaving her plate. "I'm not hungry any more."

As she was walking towards to woods, a beer in her hand that she took from a lone cooler, she could hear her aunt scolding Vivian and could feel the weight of Bucky's stare on her back.

* * *

Eventually she made it back home. By the time she did, ever one was either in bed, inside, or out on a run in the trees, chasing rabbits with vacant glee.

Her beer was empty and she wandered into the kitchen for another, coming out with two and making her way towards the porch swing. She hated beer; she preferred wine. But she knew better than to go touch Esme's stash, on penalty of a good ass whooping.

She sat there, legs crossed and her eyes staring blindly ahead. No one would understand what happened. No one would care or believe her. Her mother was never mentally stable and she was frightened by the inn fire that took Esme's mate and other pack members who were like family. She wanted to leave. Ava couldn't let her mother go alone, so she left with her in the middle of the night, leaving divorce papers on the kitchen table for Bucky to find. It was cheap, but she had to do it.

She was too young when she got married. 16 was when girls had crushes on guys who didn't know who they were, when they would go and hang out with friends till their parents demanded their return home. Ava, was married and worked in the inn with Bucky, doing what they could.

Bucky had always loved her, ever since Rudy brought him home. He had been covered in mud and his eyes were fierce and wild. Ava liked him too, but they didn't dare do anything until her father consented it. When they finally became a pair, her mother pushed it on both of them to get married, that it was meant to be, much to Rudy's despair and against his protests. That summer they did just that and were married until she turned eighteen and she left. She followed him to West Virginia, with her mother in tow. She didn't want to leave her father, but he understood that move. She was too young and she wasn't married for the right reasons. It had nothing to do with not loving Bucky, but he couldn't hear other wise.

"Your still beautiful."

She turned and looked to see Bucky leaning up against the railing, a cigarette hanging from his mouth. She hated his habit, but then again, she also missed it. "Was I supposed to grow ugly over three years?"

He chuckled and inhaled on his smoke. She pulled her hair high up on her head, removing the extra bulk from adding heat. He walked over and picked up her other beer, popping it open and sitting down next to her, making the swing move. His presence alone was enough to make her want to throw herself at him, but she refrained and watched at he savored his beer. "I can't believe your 21. We had a big trip planned for that you know. I disappointed."

She wanted to go to France and he promised on her 21st birthday he'd take her. That plan obviously fell through. "I live in French Canada, so it kinda counts." She shrugged.

He chuckled and fell silent. She could smell rain coming and she welcomed the thought of it becoming cooler. The sweat ran down in between her breasts and her fur had even been to hot. It must have been because she wasn't used to this heat any more. She was used to snow and moderate temperatures.

"Why won't you come home?" He asked quietly. His head rested against the back of the swing and he looked at her with such sad eyes.

She didn't want to answer him. She found her eyes being drawn back to his scarred throat and this time he caught her stare. He turned his head and scratched his chin, the day's stubble was finally getting itchy. She looked down at her left hand and found herself playing with an invisible ring that would never be on her finger again. "Why won't you let me go?"

He scoffed and set his beer down, inhaling what was left of his cigarette. He put it out on the bottom of his shoe and flicked the butt into the grass. "Because you didn't leave because you wanted to and I firmly believe, that you didn't want a divorce. I won't sign those papers you know. I meant it when I said: When death do us part. Really Avie, I didn't think you a coward."

It was a low blow and he knew. She wasn't a coward. Cowards ran from their problems, like her mother. She only left because it was what was right. "You don't know a damn thing about me." She muttered. "You I am not coming back here after this. This is the last time you will ever see me." She stood up and stalked to the door.

"No matter where you go, I will always find you. I will never give up on my wife."

She turned and gave him a stony glare. "Make sure to whisper that to the next woman you are in bed with Buck." She slammed the screen door behind her and hurried up to her room before he could follow her. Never give up? He slept with other women, she knew. He was her first and only. She couldn't imagine letting another man touch her like that.

In her room she stripped down and laid on the bed in her skin. She wouldn't cry. It was only the first day back and she would be damned if they made her cry. Her cousin had always been a bitch, so that was one she blew off and her father would never be happy with any thing she did. Even now she knew he pretended that every thing she did was wonderful. It was a farce.

And Bucky...she curled up and held in her tears. She wanted him, but when Esme told her he had had lovers and yet he hadn't signed those papers, her heart broke. But why should she care? She left him, he was lonely and a woman in his bed might have helped him. She didn't want him, she had no right to be angry.

But that was not what her heart told her.

* * *

Breakfast was served way before Ava dragged herself out of bed and the heat of the day had already seeped into the inn walls. She could hear people working outside and she looked out her window to see the Five working on what looked to be alter arch for the wedding. The twins were arguing while their fair haired cousin fidgeted with a screw driver. Ulf was reading a piece of paper and scratched his head. She shook her head and pulled on another pair of shorts and a tee shirt.

Down stairs she could hear Vivian's voice and Esme was trying to sooth her daughter. A few other females surrounded their alpha and her mother as Vivian was panicking. Ava continued into the kitchen and sat in a chair and looked on with the others.

"I asked them to do this months ago mom! I don't understand why they reject it now!" The golden haired girl covered her face. "Now what am I going to do for a cake?"

Ava leaned over and looked up at a woman she recognized as Magda. "What happened?" She whispered.

Magda leaned closer to her and whispered back. "The bakery that was supposed to do Vivian's wedding cake chickened out, said that their bakery couldn't do her order, moon knows why."

Esme took her daughter by the arms and tried to comfort her. "Oh baby, I know your upset, but we will find a way. I bet another bakery would do it."

Vivian gave a sour laugh and looked at the ceiling. "They were the only one's who would have done it. I already asked."

Esme closed her eyes and sighed. Her daughter was right. This was a bad thing. They needed tons of cupcakes and a three tiered cake and Vivian was so picky that every bakery around had denied her.

"I can do it."

All the women looked at Ava and stared. Vivian shook her head and rubbed her temples. "I don't want a box cake that looks like a two year old made it."

Ava stood back up and put her hands on her hips, boldly staring down her cousin. "I work in a bakery back home. I make cakes all day from scratch and I also decorate them." She tilted her nose up just a bit. If Vivian was going to be a jerk, she would too.

Vivian blinked and then ran out of the kitchen, leaving Ava and the others confused. She returned just as quickly and with a couple sheets of paper. She held them out towards Ava. "If you can do this, I'll let you do it."

It was a doosy. The recipe was difficult, but no impossible, and the design and shape was even a little more difficult. It was three tiers like she said, but the cake had a quilt look to it, along with fondant flowers coming out of the top. A small town bakery wouldn't be able to do this. Ava sighed and looked up at her cousin. "I've done worse." She lied, but she wanted to help her stressed cousin who was probably feeling her life was over if this didn't turn out right.

All the women in the room sighed with relief and Esme said thanks to the moon goddess. "Tell me what you need and I will get it for you. We have a huge kitchen here and if we need to, a large freezer."

Vivian had regained her composer. "If you mess up, I will beat your ass back to the airport."

Ava glared back at her cousin and felt her claws grow a bit. "Not if I get you first cousin."

* * *

**There, this one was a little more into the detail and yes, there will be drama! I feel bad for making Bucky miserable, but at the same time, I don't. Is that wrong of me?**

**Any way drop a review on what you thought!  
**


	3. Cursed

**Disclaimer: I do not own Blood and Chocolate, nor any of the characters. This is strictly fan written.**

**Well enjoy.**

**-Jane**

* * *

The rest of the day was uneventful and she avoided her moody cousin and instead found some sweet tea Esme had made and sat herself on the porch once more. Even though she didn't like it here, the porch was by far her favorite place.

She had found one of her mother's old books from the vanity and settled for the sounds of the working pack and the arguing of the boys who were only yards away from her. She could also see Gabriel, her father, and Bucky working on an older truck. Rudy pointed at some thing under the hood and Gabriel reached over and wiggled some thing, shaking his head.

Suddenly, she remembered how at the old inn, her, Esme, and her mother would make lunch for the pack members who worked outside and take it to them. The twin's father and Gregory's dad had also loved it. Most of the pack men where spoiled during those days. Some thing in her chest ached for that old memory and she decided that the book was no longer interesting.

She went into the kitchen from the screen door and searched the counters, pantries, and shelf's for a cook book. Finally she found a little box that the pack women put all their recipes. She flipped through them, each she remembered eating at one time at a table with her family. Finally, she found a pasty recipe and Ava smiled. At the bakery she worked at they made them with bread dough instead of pie crusts. Her boss called them walking Sunday dinners because you could eat them like a sandwich.

It was still early enough to mix bread dough and let it rise. It took her a while to find all the ingredients but she finally had the dough covered and let it rise. She found the left over roast beef from last night and took the potatoes and mashed them. The extra juice in the container she poured in a skillet and warmed it up. She would make gravy. Men liked gravy.

She pre-heated the oven and then after making sure the dough was ready, she made neat little buns with the meat and potatoes tucked inside. She retrieved the book and tea once more and settled down in the kitchen, only getting up to check on the temperature of the beef broth in the skillet.

Her earlier thoughts of the book returned. It truly was uninteresting. She wasn't much for romance novels anyway. She preferred real love.

"Wow, it seems like Betty Crocker decided to visit us today."

Ava turned around and saw Reneta and Esme. They both looked tired and worn out and by the smell, had been cleaning up in the top floors, where the heat was the worse.

Ava shrugged and began on the gravy. "I was bored. I am making lunch for the boys."

"Oooo." Reneta peaked in the oven window, licking her lips. "Those look tasty. Write down the recipe and put it in the box." She danced over to the stove. "You may give Esme a run for her money."

Esme laughed and threw her head back, giving Reneta a cheeky look. "It runs threw her vains. Her grandmother could cook, her mother, her father, and myself and I think Vivian is catching on to it took."

Ava smiled. Maybe she was being to hard and stubborn before. She was enjoying this time. Maybe if she didn't fight it, she would have a decent time with the pack after all.

"Vivian can cook meat, Esme...she can't bake a pie to save her life." Reneta shivered in disgust and threw her arm around Ava's shoulders. "So you are up to the the challenge of trying to please the alpha female? You are brave."

Ava sniffed nonchalantly and elongated her neck in pride. "She doesn't scare me. I grew up with her and lived with Esme for a while. I ain't scare of no cranky teenager."

Esme gaped at her and then pouted. "What is that supposed to mean?" She cried. "I was a good auntie!"

"You liked to paddle my butt." The timer went off and Ava grabbed the oven mitts and went to the oven.

"Well then you shouldn't have been such a little shit." Esme posed herself delicately and then tilted her head. "So you really work in a bakery."

Ava set down the hot pan and prodded the smallest bun, to make sure it wasn't burnt. Proud of herself she stepped back like an artist to a painting. "Sure do."

"Have you made a wedding cake before?" Reneta raised her eye brow and waited till Ava turned around to scoot a hot bun off the pan and towards her. Now she had to wait for the gravy.

Ava sighed. "Not by myself no...but I didn't want to tell Vivian that. I mean, its stupid some one would take her order and then dump it last minute. She's getting married. People who do it right only get one wedding. That is unless, some thing happens and...well you know." She shrugged and turned around, frowning at Reneta when she saw the 'stolen' bun.

"Will you ever reconsider coming back? I know this isn't your home and the pack is different, but kiddo, a lot of us miss you. The Five almost jumped out of their fur when they heard you where coming back. Bucky is desperate to have you back." Esme pleaded. "And I know Rudy doesn't live here but he misses his baby. Four years is a long time."

Ava grew quiet and stirred her gravy slowly. Bucky wanted her home, her father wanted her home, the Five, her aunt. But Esme did have it right. This wasn't her home. "I can't come back."

Esme sighed and threw up her hands. "Explains everything."

Ava made her escape when she went to deliver her gifts to the boys out side. The Five almost crawled all over her and they called that she was the one and only love of their lives. That is what she gets for being a good cook, she supposed. When she approached the truck, the three men could smell the food and they removed themselves from the vehicle.

"Oh, Ava, this is wonderful." Rudy took the paper plates and set them on the tail gate of the truck. He also took the bowl of buns and set them down and let her pour the gravy on his plate.

Gabriel had two down before he even grabbed a plate and with a full mouth he begged her to show Vivian how to make these. Bucky sighed in contentment and didn't even touch the gravy. "I don't know what you did, but great goddess above, you are a genius. Bread, meat...gravy..." Gabriel mumbled on and she almost burst out laughing.

Rudy smiled at his daughter and was going to pat her arm, but decided not too. He had always struggled with showing her affection, mainly because she had a hard time with people touching her constantly.

"So, I heard you are doing our cake. How are you going to accomplish over 200 cupcakes and on top of that, making a decorating a cake that is the size of the inn?" Gabriel asked her leaning against the truck and watching her curiously.

Ava sighed and shrugged. "Just trying to help out my cousin in her crisis."

Rudy laughed and Bucky shook his head. "Her crisis has been happening since she got engaged."

"I don't remember having that kind of luck at my wedding." Ava shrugged. She had it pretty easy. "In fact, the whole pack pitched in and made the cake and it was pretty."

Bucky looked away from them, he didn't want to talk about their wedding at that moment, but Gabriel didn't notice his friend. "See, I told her that too and she insisted that this cake had to be perfect. Her dress isn't even half as fancy as she wants that cake."

Ava shrugged and looked at Rudy who seemed to be thinking about something. She found her job done, so she took the paper plates and the bowl of buns and left the container of gravy, smiling when they called their thanks. She was right. It was rewarding.

* * *

The moon was ripe and full and Ava's blood sang the song of the moon and her spine wiggled as she made her way to the trees. She was going to run long and hard tonight. Tomorrow she started on the large amount of cupcakes. Thank the moon for the industrial freezers the inn had to keep all the food for the pack and inn guests.

Others were also going into the trees like she did, either on their own or pairs and groups. She was thinking about running with her father but then something inside told her that she just wanted to be alone.

She began to peel off her clothes and the air on her skin made little bumps appear and her breasts perk up. She giggled slightly when she took off in demi form, letting her laugh turn into a howl. Some returned it with their own howls of happiness.

She could hear others running around her and away. Some of them laughed and ran next to her momentarily until they made their own paths. Ava had always been fast; one of the fastest even. She used to race the Five and Vivian and always left them in the dust. She was so small that her legs easily carried her.

Finally she stopped and let her fur come over her body and her muzzle replace her mouth. Oh the sweet night, how she howled and longed for it. She took off again, becoming a blurr in the darkness.

This is what she wanted, to run and be free and do what she wanted, not what others wanted for her. She didn't want to leave Rudy's home, she didn't want to leave West Virginia, she didn't want to be a child bride, but she had. No, she was a strong creature, she could live where she liked, mate who she wanted and howl at the moon when she wanted.

A black form pasted by her and she skidded to a stop, surprised by the thunderous sounds of their paws. She recognized the scent and put her head down in a passive manor.

Bucky paced to her and walked around her, a playful growl in his throat. He bumped her and she stepped a few paces away from him. He smirked and then looked ahead before looking at her again. He wanted to race her.

She huffed and walked ahead of him, ignoring his playful pushes and nips. She dared him to bite her so she could turn and snap at him, but she knew she would lose that fight. Finally he blocked her path and stood right in front of her, not letting her go left or right. He wasn't going to give up. Technically he was still her husband since he didn't sign those papers, but that didn't mean he had to annoy her.

Finally she whined and he tilted his head. She didn't want to play games, she just wanted to run and enjoy the sounds and smells of the crisp night. He let out a long breath and stepped a side, obviously disappointed that she wasn't responding to him. She slowly walked past him and almost growled when he began to walk with her. Maybe he didn't want to run alone tonight.

After a while she got tired of walking in her fur and she shifted into the human girl. He wasn't leaving any time soon and even if she ran he would find a way to bump into her. The leaves and moss under feet felt like a soft, damp carpet and she smiled when she heard the sound of water.

"Hey, are you going to keep acting like a brat or are we ever going to talk?" Bucky jogged up next to her and she found her blood rushing to her face. What a lovely body he has.

She shrugged and kept walking, ducking under a tree limb that hung low. "I have nothing to talk about really."

"Well," He sighed. "I should apologize for last night. I mean, your right, if I cared like that I wouldn't have slept with those other women."

She felt the swift pang in her heart. He only confirmed what she already knew, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt any less. "I left you." She said monotonously. "I didn't expect you to wait around for me...or to not sign the divorce papers." She added with slight annoyance.

"And I won't." He stopped in front of her and she came to close from bumping into his bare chest. "The thing you don't get is that I won't quit hoping you'll come home and we can work things out. I know you left for your mom and I understood, but I have no idea, in any part of my brain, why you would want to divorce me. I have no answers." His face was laced with the hurt that was clear in his voice. "No one has the right answers about anything and what is worse is you won't tell any one. I know why you left, that's why I don't think you abandoned your pack. But why, baby, why? Was I not a good husband?" He took her by the shoulders and rubbed his thumbs over her flesh.

She looked away. She couldn't look him in the eyes when she knew that the pain and heart break in them was because of her. "No, you were wonderful." She whispered. Nothing she said would help his case and she silently wondered if he was better off not knowing why she wanted to divorce so bad.

She was right, it only made it worse. She saw him sag and clench his jaw and his eyes shut. She wanted to console him, but what could she say? "Then, why?" He said in a low tone, his hands dropping from her arms and she could feel herself grasping at those hands.

"I didn't get married because I wanted to, I got married because my mother told me too." She whispered.

His eyes opened and he stared right at her. That was news to him apparently. She felt herself backing away when he began to look angry. "So it was all a lie? It was all for mommy?"

"No, but yes...I mean I don't know..." She shook her head. "I mean you are the only man I have ever loved, but I didn't do it for the right reasons. I just, I just...I don't know." She ran a hand down her other arm, feeling like he was going to kill her with words.

"You don't know?" He laughed and shook his head. "Good, I am glad that I was just a stage in your life, not some one you really wanted to live the rest of your life with." He was going to walk away from her and she hated when he did that.

"I do!" She covered her mouth quickly and shook her head. "But on my own terms." She wasn't even sure if she was the one who said those words. Her voice didn't sound like her's.

Bucky threw up his hands and walk back towards her and flung his arms out. "Are you going to tell me what those are or am I going to have to figure out why my wife doesn't, but does want to be with me?"

She began to get angry and felt her claws grow slightly. He wanted to know, she told him, but what else could she tell him? "I told you what you wanted to hear, you don't have to be a total ass about it. Look I don't know and now isn't the time to talk about it. I just lost my mom and every one wants me to come back to a pack that I am pretty sure doesn't give two shits about me. I'm sorry, ok? But I was 16 and that was young! I missed my whole high school career and I didn't have friends." She pushed past him and continued on. "Just leave me alone, I don't want to fight."

She heard him follow her and by the sounds of it, he was angry. "No, I won't leave you alone. I want to settle this right here and now." He grabbed her arm and she turned, only to have his lips descend on hers in a very hungry kiss.

She was frozen, and scared. She couldn't feel her body and she knew that pushing him would only make her upset too. She wanted to kiss him. His tongue prodded her lips to open and she obeyed with a small moan. What was she doing? This wasn't going to help him. But she lost control of her body and found her self holding him close to her. She gasped when he left her and the heat of his body disappeared.

He stood there, like a wild man, panting and looking at her with lusty eyes. He smelled like he was ready for her, but she knew that he wouldn't ask or push it. Finally regained his composer. "So what was that?"

She touched her lips and she could taste blood, who's though, she didn't know. She hadn't been kissed in years or touched and her body ached with desire for him. But her heart...she knew it wasn't right. She'd leave the day after the wedding and be gone again, trying to forget his sad eyes and hopeless pleas for her to stay with him. "I don't know any more."

He turned from her and she could see the tremble in his body. He was trying to hold in his anguish and Ava wanted to comfort him. "I guess then it really is over." He said, as if it was a curse and he began to walk back the way they just came. Ava watched him leave and then when he was out of sight, she threw her self on the ground and tore at it.

"Damn it!" She cried, flinging rocks and dirt every where. "Why do I not know? Why am a failure? I am cursed! Cursed!" With the last word she fell onto the moss and let the sobs ruin her body.

She wanted to go home. But there was no home to go to.

* * *

**Yes, she loves him. An inner war is the worst one.**

**Drop a review and tell me how it was!  
**

**Thanks.  
**


	4. When I howl at the full moon again

**Disclaimer: I do not own Blood and Chocolate, nor any of the characters. This is strictly fan written.**

**Well enjoy.**

**-Jane**

* * *

She threw her clothes into her bag, her eyes blurred and her lip quivering. She wouldn't cry, moon be damned, she refused to cry! She was going back to the little apartment that she used to share with her mother. She wasn't going to stay here, she would leave, be gone. Just like her mother...

She stopped cold. She didn't want to be like her mother. She couldn't abandon everything like that, forget to live and die before her body. She didn't want to be her mother. Her mother was a monster who drained her victims of the love and compassion they once had for her.

She clutched the shirt in her hand and felt her heart beat slow. No, she couldn't leave like that, she had to do Vivian's cake, she had to at least spend time with Rudy. She at least had to say good bye.

She covered her face and sat down on the bed, the soft plush of it devouring her and surrounding her like soft clouds. She was her mother, she was. She left her husband, she let down her family, she hurt them, and now she was running from them because she couldn't face her inner demons. She was her mother.

When the inn burned down, her mother made her go with her, leaving Rudy high and dry and with the questions that Bucky asked her. When they settled down she didn't do anything, refusing to work or even take care of herself. Ava had to get a job at the local bakery, which she had minimal experience, and make sure her mother ate that day. Ava knew she was going to die, it was obvious. That is why Ava left with her mother; she couldn't live with herself if her mother died alone like that. She ate Ava alive and after a while Ava wondered if she even lived.

"I hate her..." Ava whispered between her fingers and she almost retched when the smell from the vanity reached her nostrils. She didn't want to admit it, but she had always hated her mother.

She heard a knock at her door and her hands dropped from her face in surprise. She wasn't going to answer it, the knock was just to be polite. She was right because seconds later the door opened and Rudy popped his head in. "Are you hun- what are you doing?"

She kept staring at him, not saying anything. He shut the door behind him and walked over to the bed, looking at the mess of clothes. "What are you doing baby?"

Her lip trembled. She was an adult damn it, she was not going to cry to daddy about her problems. But she found it harder when he looked at her with sad eyes. She began to sob and covered her face, not even trying to contain the tears. "I am like mom."

Rudy sat next to his daughter and held her to him, patting her back and trying to comfort her. "No, Ava, you are nothing like her. Not at all."

She cried into his chest and clung to him. "Yes I am! I left Bucky like mom left you and I can't even tell him why I won't come home. I just left my family because I had no spine." Her words were broken up by her sobs and tears. Rudy's shirt was starting to get wet.

"No, no sweat heart. You left because you wanted to make your mother happy. You are as much as a victim as the rest of us." Her stroked her hair and sighed. "Ava, I loved your mother, very much, even after leaving with my baby. I know...I know that she is no longer with us but if she was alive and she came back, I would forgive her."

Ava sat up and looked at her father with wide eyes, her mouth open. "Why daddy, why would you do that?" She whispered. She didn't have a memory of her parents ever being in love or her mother ever telling her father that she loved him.

He smiled sadly and kissed her forehead, patting her shoulder and getting up, walking slowly towards the door. "The same reason that Bucky keeps chasing you." He put his hand on the door handle and looked at her. "I know you have some things to figure out and maybe a marriage is just not in the cards right now, but I know, for certain, you are in love and that is a good enough reason to stay home this time."

She watched him leave and felt the weight of his words pull her down into the bed. He loved her mother, just like Bucky loved her.

She had a lot of thinking to do.

* * *

Midnight was quiet, strangely enough. Even the soft music and the clanging of pans didn't seem to break the silence. The sticky heat was now just fading away and with the kitchen's screen door open and letting out the even hotter air. The flour and anything else that stuck to the skin made a strange paste on Ava's chest. She was starting not to sweat so much and she was happy that she had found a fan in one of the utility closets.

Cupcakes littered every space in the kitchen. It was a large, decked in chrome type, like what you'd see in a restaurant. It was nothing like what would be in a home, unless Martha Stewart and Rachel Ray got married and had a house. She was finishing with the frosting and making the tiny flowers, made out of fondant, and was about to put them on the cupcakes. She had one specially set out for Vivian. She would show her cousin that she could bake. That little punk.

Talking to her dad actually inspired Ava to quit her crying and deal with her life. While making cupcakes, she had thought over many things and actually came up with many solutions. Even the issue with Bucky. No one would be happy, but she had to do what was right for herself, not what everyone wanted.

"That is the most cupcakes I have seen in my life." She heard from the screen door. She turned to see Vivian standing there with wide eyes and a slight smile. "More than I asked for."

"I felt challenged." Ava mumbled and blew a hair out of her face. Her cousin smelt like the woods. "They will be done by morning and we will freeze them so they stay good. I am doing the cake tomorrow."

Vivian walked around looking at the cupcakes, her smile growing fond. "You really did it."

Ava turned and grabbed the one she set aside for Vivian. It was completely finished and ready to eat. "Well, try it first." She raised her eyebrows. "They might taste like shit you know."

Vivian took it and examined it, like it was a science project. Finally she peeled away the cupcake wrapper and bit into it, receiving a mouth full of spongy and heavy cake. Ava watched carefully as her cousin chewed and then leaned back on one leg. "Moon...I owe you one, seriously."

Ava smiled and shrugged. "I actually think that by making you those cupcakes, I can start reversing my wrong that I did toward my family."

Vivian kept on with the cupcake, watching Ava with thoughtful eyes. "You didn't hurt me, you hurt my mom, dad, and uncle." She looked down and sighed. "I just...I am getting scared and that doesn't happen often, so don't think me weak." She sent a quick glare at Ava, who shrugged and rolled her eyes.

"Why are you scared? Wedding jitters?" Ava bent over again to continue placing flowers on the cupcakes.

"I don't want to be like your mom...or like you and Bucky."

Ava stopped and turned towards her cousin, her face pinched. "Me and Bucky?" She set down her tool and placed her hands on her hips. "What do you mean like me and Bucky?"

Vivian sighed and sat down in one of the chairs placed by the wall. "You were so in love with him and then, poof, it changed. I don't want to wake up one morning and not love Gabriel any more. I can't even imagine doing that."

Ava crossed her arms. "You don't think I love Bucky?"

"You don't act like you do. You left divorce papers on the table with your ring and a note saying you didn't feel the same any more." Vivian scoffed and shook her head and closed her eyes. "He actually ran out of the house and went looking for you."

Ava looked away and bit her lip. She did do that, but she couldn't let her past drag her back like that. "I love him. I love him so much it made me stupid." She dropped her arms. "You are not like me and my mom...you are the complete opposite of what she was. Don't let that stop you. You are you, I am me. Our lives are not going to be the same. Get married and quit bitching about cupcakes."

Vivian frowned and tilted her head. "You know...fuck you, but that actually helped."

Ava shrugged and looked away. "I do what I can."

They remained silent after a while. Her cousin barely moved and any movement she did make was with her face, like she was arguing with herself and losing...Ava wanted to ask if she was going to be ok, but then Vivian got up and began to help her with placing flowers on the cupcakes, studying the ones that Ava did and copying them. Ava wanted to tell her to go sit down and leave it to her, but then again...it was nice to have silent company.

It took a couple of hours for them to finish, but finally, with sighs of relief, they were done. Vivian smiled and looked content with herself. "That was fun, but tedious."

"I still have a cake to do." Ava started taking treys to the freezers. "And then your mother wants me to go dress shopping and blah blah blah. You need to stop getting married, its making me break out."

"I'll work on that." Vivian rolled her eyes.

* * *

She didn't want to admit it, but watching her former mate run towards the inn with out a shirt and no pants, excited her. He was smeared with sweat, dirt, and leave were planted firmly in his hair. She stayed near the porch as he passed by, not saying one word to her, to retrieve his clothes. She felt guilty, making him like that, but she knew he probably didn't want to talk. She had yet to change from her flour covered clothes and wash off the mess on her skin.

"You smell awful." She heard him say and she nodded in agreement.

"Sure do." She looked at her hands. Even her nails were completely caked.

He had found his jeans and had his shirt in his hands. "Baking again? I thought you were gonna wait to do that." He buttoned his jeans and shook his head, trying to release the leaves that were stuck.

"I needed to think." She shrugged and looked away from him.

He copied her and shrugged, pulling on his shirt and turned to walk towards the surrounding buildings. She felt sad that was all he say to her. She deserved it though, it was what she asked for.

"I heard you have a house?" Ava asked, before he was out of reach. It worked, because he turned around, looking at her with surprise.

"Yup." He nodded, sticking his hands into his pockets. "Why?"

She looked back at the door and then at him. "Can I see it?"

He was thinking hard about it. Really hard. Ava wondered if he just hated her now or if he was just acting this way so she would think he was hurt again. Maybe he finally realized that chasing after her would be pointless. He stroked his chin and his brows knitted close together. "I suppose." He didn't sound so sure.

She walked up next to him and he started to walk back the direction he was heading. His shoulders were slumped and he walked quickly. Ava had to walk swiftly to keep up with him.

His house was the biggest one in the small group of houses. It had a wrap around porch, just like the inn and it was painted a light cream color. She remembered driving around in Maryland and every time he'd see a colored house he'd shake his head and ask if people really thought it looked good. She wanted a blue house, but he would have never gone for it.

It was very modern, despite the other buildings around them. When he opened the door she could smell the dust and oak. He wasn't messy, he just didn't know how to clean. He would fold his clothes, put them away, if some one else washed them for him. He always ended up bleaching things he wasn't supposed to.

She followed him inside and even in the dark she could see how empty it was. He flipped on the light and went straight to the kitchen, retrieving himself a beer. She stayed in what was supposed to be the entry/ living room, but there was only a t.v. on the floor and a lawn chair. Simple man. The walls inside were nothing like the outside of the house. It was colorful and tasteful. They were pale colors so it wasn't over baring.

"I am building the furniture. I have to finish making bed frames for the inn and then I will be able to work on it more." He walked by her and sat in the lawn chair, taking a chug of beer. He looked at her and pointed behind him. "If you want to see it the rest is back there."

She made a face and bit the inside of her cheek. Maybe he was to tired to care. It was close to dawn. Soon, she would have to succumb to her body's needs. She turned from him and walked on the plush carpet toward the hallway, passing a dinning room. This place defiantly smelled of him.

She passed a bathroom, that was still missing tile, but she could see the small, neat pile of the rest, patiently waiting by the tub, which was also impressive. It was like what was in the inn, only, a little more modern. She moved on to find a spare bedroom, filled with meaningless things. Across from that room, was Bucky's. It had a large, unmade bed and a dresser that was just as intimidating and made of very dark and polished wood. The sheets on the bed, she knew were not cheap and she like that he wasn't a stereotypical guy and didn't go for black. The dark blue was very fitting.

She suddenly felt the urge to clean. She had yet to be worn out and she doubted that Bucky would get all huffy and puffy about her touching his things. She once shared them.

She made the bed, gathered the laundry, and moved his nasty work boots out by the door. She found an old sock and some Windex. There was nothing to dust with so she made due with the sock and Windex. After his room, she moved on to the bathroom, and after that, she went out to the living room and picked up dishes that were laying around. He finally looked away from his t.v. to see what she was doing. "Avie, what the hell are you doing woman?"

"Cleaning this beautiful house. It smells like nasty man in here." She kicked a pair of boxers down the hallway. Men had no shame when it came to their personal space.

"Baby, I am a nasty man. Now stop it, you are going to starve my pet mice." He sighed and watched her pick up garbage.

"I don't remember you being this gross." She muttered and walked into the kitchen. She turned on the water hot and pulled the drain. Okay, maybe he was a little bit dirty, but, she gave him props for not having rotten food every where. The water also helped wash off the mess on her arms.

After a while, she began to feel tired and after the last dish was washes, she almost couldn't stand. Maybe she didn't know she was that tired. She stretched and yawned, walking slowly to the door.

"You don't have to go. I'm not sleeping, you can have the bed." He said to her as she reached the door.

She shook her head and rubbed her eyes. "My dad will look for me." She mumbled. She felt like a little kid who was past her bed time.

"You are 21 for moon's sake, he won't be looking for you." He set down his beer and left his 'comfortable' chair. He stood in front of her and tilted his head. "Unless you are scared you'll wake up in the morning with my hand down your pants."

She rolled her burning eyes and shook her head. "Oh, yes, I am terrified that you will ruin my purity." She stumbled slightly and caught herself. _Bed, bed. _

He couldn't stand it any more and finally bent down and picked her up. She squealed and wrapped her arms around his neck. She hated being picked up and he knew it. He chuckled and walked back towards the bedroom, ignoring her slurred protests. When he sat her down on the bed, she went silent. It was extremely comfortable, he made sure that he had the best bed he could find.

He slipped off her shoes and pulled back the blankets, laughing when she dove into a spot and nuzzled his pillow. "Hey Bucky..." She asked quietly.

He pulled the blankets over her and sat down on the bed, setting his hand on the small of her back. "What?"

She frowned. What was she going to say? What did she want at that moment? What was she going to achieve? "I really, really, really do love you. More than you know."

He was silent, not sure how to respond to her. She loved him. Yeah, he knew. He loved her and she knew that too. Then why did she want so badly to be rid of him? "Then stay home. Stay with me and don't go any where every again."

She clutched the pillow and clenched her eyes close together. Vivian said she was scared and she was still getting married. Her dad still loved her mom. "Not yet."

He looked away and she felt her heart go into her stomach. It made her sick to see him like this. "When?"

She thought for a moment and stared off into the darkness. She didn't know and she didn't know if she ever would. She touched his hand and felt over the calloused knuckles. "When I howl at the full moon again. I am here now, isn't that enough?"

"You don't want to spend time with me unless you feel you need to." He didn't look at her. "Why should I be happy about that?"

She retracted her hand and clutched at the pillow again. "That I am laying in you bed, talking to you, still in love with you."

He looked at her, like she had never seen before. She was a different person, some one he did not know and she felt sorry for him that he had to endure her. He kept staring at her, until he knew she was asleep. He stroked her hair and then ran his thumb over her lips. He missed those lips.

He held his head in his hands and sat there till the sun began to peak through the curtains. "What am I doing?"

* * *

**I feel that maybe this story is a little dull, but I wasn't really going for another rambunctious love story, I wanted something softer, not sure if I am succeeding...**


	5. Crisis for a Crisis

**Thanks for the review MistressLynell! I appreciate it very much. Any ways, I just want to say to my readers that if you have any comments, questions, concerns, or you find a mistake that needs fixing, do not hesitate to let me know. I do not bite people's heads off just because they were trying to help or offering constructive criticism. I welcome it.**

**-Jane  
**

* * *

Ava ran as fast as she could, not caring if the rain was making her blind. She was late, so late and now she had less than ten hours to make a wedding cake and then go with her aunt to get a 'more suitable' dress for the wedding. That gave her less than ten hours, she realized. She cursed Bucky for letting her sleep in but he was no where in sight and he was defiantly in trouble.

She burst through the door and skidded to a stop, realizing her bare feet were dragging in mud onto the tile of the kitchen. The two women who were standing by the oven looked over at her with wide eyes, not sure what she was doing.

"Mother of the..." She turned in circles, noticing that it was way to late to go back. She grabbed a rag that was laying on a counter and tried to clean the mud from the floor and her feet.

Her aunt Esme had just entered the kitchen in time to see the mud from Ava's feet and her beautiful face turned red. "Ava Lene Revoux! Damn it girl I just mopped that floor! And for moon sake's why are you soaking wet!"

Ava froze and her eyes widened. Oh no...She slowly looked over to see her aunt stalking towards her. "But I didn't-"

"Enough, go up stairs and bath for moon's sake and get ready quick. Vivian's dress doesn't fit any more and she is about to lose her head." It looked like Esme was about to, too.

"Yes, 'em." She ducked her head and ran by her aunt, hiding her face from the other two women. How embarrassing to be yelled at in front of other people. Damn her moody aunt.

As she was running up the stairs, she turned the corner to quick and smacked face first into a person. She stumbled back and grabbed the rail before she could fall down the stairs she just climbed. The person turned out to be her father.

"Daddy, you scared me." She put her hand on her chest.

"There you are, I have been looking all morning for you. Esme is pitching a fit. Where were you?" He crossed his arms. He wasn't to enthused about her disappearing after all.

"Daddy I am an adult. I just helped Bucky clean his house last night and fell asleep. I overslept, that's all." She walked up a couple of steps. "And if you see him, you tell him he is in for it." She bared the empty threat on her father to pass and hurried up to her room.

Outside in the hall, were the Five, to her luck. Good this day get any worse? _Yes, actually, it can. _She shrugged and continued to her door. "Oooh, some one smells like a certain wolf man. Were we frolicking with the ex last night?" Gregory teased her, pulling lightly on a loose stand of hair from her disastrous bun.

She swiped at him and turn toward him. "That is my husband, you nit wit and its non of your business what we were doing. I am surprised you even know the word 'frolicking'." His face hardened and the others behind him began to laugh. She turned toward the door and grabbed the knob.

"Didn't you hear? He took the papers in this morning. You're officially divorced." Gregory said with a smug smirk and she wanted to smash his face into the wall.

It took her breath away hearing that. He took them in.

She gripped the knob and turned it, slamming the door in their faces. Why was she so upset? This is what she wanted. She asked for it; he only did what she had asked. But why did it hurt so much?

* * *

Ava did not think her cousin was one to cry over a dress. She was wrong.

The whole way into town Vivian panicked and spontaneously broke into tears. She gained three pounds, and the frail silk had ripped fatally. There was no repairing it. The wedding was tomorrow and it was raining, mud getting out of control, her cake wasn't done (Ava got an earful about it), and she was on the verge of killing one of her bridesmaids, but she missed which one.

Her cousin was under so much stress, that she was having a nervous break down and Ava wasn't sure to be scared or annoyed.

"Vivian, honey, calm down, its ok. We have enough to get another." Esme tried console her as Ava saw the first light coming into town. The rain was persistent here and it made load thuds on the car.

"No its not, mother. I had that dress made for me. Made! Now I have to settle for a cheaper, not a beautiful one? My wedding is falling apart!" Vivian covered her face.

"They could have one similar to it and maybe you might find one better." Ava patted Vivian's shoulder, only to receive an icy glare.

"That was the dress of my dreams Ava. There is not another one like it!"

Ava went silent. It was pointless.

Once to the small town wedding dress store, she saw why Vivian was so upset. They are horrendous selections of dresses, in the windows any way. Inside they were greeted by a very fat lady with bright red hair and dark red lipstick. Ava started to feel some of her cousin's anxiety.

"Well howdy darling! I am Beatrice and you are?" She stuck out her hand to Vivian, instantly knowing who the bride was. It must have been because she worked in the business so long.

"Vivian Gandillion." Vivian tried to keep a straight face. No meat person would see her cry.

"What a lovely name for a lovely girl and I bet this lovely lady over here is your mother. What can I do for you today, Miss Vivian?" Her voice was very sweet and high pitched. It made Ava want to bury her head in one of the outrageously large gowns next to her.

Before Vivian could tell her tale of tragedy, Esme put on a sad face and looked at Beatrice. "She is getting married tomorrow and her dress ripped beyond repair."

Vivian's lip trembled but she hide it by looking at a dress and Ava stood in front of her cousin so Beatrice or Esme could see her cry again. Beatrice's reaction was as large as her. "Oh good heavens you poor baby! Do you happen to have the dress with you?"

"Well, yes, but we wanted to see if we could get another one. It is pretty bad." Esme tried to explain.

"It was only three pounds." Vivian muttered only to Ava and Ava nodded. She knew what only a few pounds could do to a wedding dress.

Beatrice shook her head. "I'm sure you know that a wedding dress is one of the most important parts of a wedding. I bet you are crushed it tore on you. You bring that dress in and I will see if I can fix it in any way."

Vivian perked up and looked at her mother with hope. Ava didn't even have to be asked and went out into the rain and retrieved the bag in which the dress was stowed.

Beatrice's face when she saw the dress reminded Ava of a sad pig. She looked all over the torn back and rubbed the silk in between her fingers. "Oh honey, I am so sorry. I can't fix this."

Vivian squeezed her eyes shut and rubbed her temples. Esme put the dress back into the bag and shook her head. "Is there anything like this here?"

Beatrice shook her head and sighed heavily. "No darling, not here. But," She perked up and took Vivan's arm. "I am certain we can have you in another dress, even if I have to work all night. I can't have no pretty girl like you walking down that isle with her head down."

Esme and Ava sat on an overly plush couch that smelled like powdery perfume and Ava sneezed a couple of times. Vivian didn't seem hopeful that anything could ever replace her dream dress. Beatrice had her work cut out for her.

* * *

Ava knew that Vivian was not a weak little girl. But the alpha female was under so much pressure that she looked like one.

There was no way to console her. None of the dresses she tried on did anything for her and Esme was also on the brink of tears, unsure on how to help her daughter. Ava still had to do the cake and knew if this didn't wrap up quickly, there would be even more things to worry about.

So Ava removed herself from the couch and began to search for dresses with Beatrice, who was starting to look distressed. Nothing she pulled was even slightly good enough for the girl.

"I just don't know what to do." Beatrice said quietly when she and Ava were out of ear shot of Vivian. "I can't let her walk out of here with out a dress, that would just be pathetic of me."

Ava smiled sympathetically. "We will find some thing, she just doesn't know what she is looking for."

Beatrice crossed her arms and pouted in thought. Ava wondered what the woman could possibility be thinking about until Beatrice's face lite up. "Silly me, I know what might do. I have some rental dresses that I might just sell, half price. Come look and see if any of them would work for her, since you are related to her and all."

She wanted to laugh. Just because she was related to the bride didn't mean she knew her best. In fact she knew that any thing she picked would not make one difference to her cousin, but she obliged and followed the large woman into the back room of the store.

"Now, I know the dress she had was vintage and very form fitting. I don't have any silk in her size and that is ready to rent or sale, but-" Beatrice started grabbing bags of dresses and handing them to Ava. "I think, with your help, we can get close to what she wants."

Beatrice pushed her over to a rack and started taking the dresses from Ava's arms and hanging them up. Her boisterous humming made Ava want to kick her. Once all the dresses where hanging up on the rack, Beatrice started flipping threw them. "Now, she is very fit and beautiful and I like the form fitting ones on her, but what about a mermaid dress?"

Ava shook her head. Vivian was no mermaid. "No, I wouldn't even try."

Beatrice pouted and then went back to flipping through the dresses. Ava spotted on with little beading and beautiful lace. Vivian and lace...crazy enough it just might work. "Wait, that lace one, two dresses back, that lace one."

Beatrice scrunched her nose and shook her head. "That is not enough for her."

"You saw that silk dress. Its light and airy enough for her and plus, you never know until you try." Ava would not give up. She had a feeling and her cousin had to have a dress, this was very serious.

"Fine." Beatrice gave up the fight and took the dress off the rack. "But you show it to her." She put the dress in Ava's arms and shooed her out to the show room.

Esme was sitting with her face in her hands and Vivian was sitting on the stand, looking like a kicked dog. Ava rushed over and flashed the dress in front of Vivian, who's face pinched in dislike. "Its lace."

"You are trying it on because I have a cake to bake and this is perfect because I said so, now get up." Ava helped her cousin stand up, since she was in a very heavy dress. "Trust me please, Vivie, I you need a dress and this is the only thing I have seen so far that might be it."

Vivian didn't look very pleased but she softened a bit when she saw Ava pleading with her eyes. She sighed and grabbed the bag, heading toward the dressing room where Beatrice was patiently waiting.

"Lace, Ava Lene? Lace on my baby?" Esme was looking at the girl like she was crazy. "I don't think this will work." She put her head back in her hands.

"Well sitting there and having no hope won't help." Ava snapped back. "You two are going to drive me crazy." She crossed her arms. She was starting to feel sassy.

Esme rolled her eyes and glued her eyes to the dressing room door. Ava's throat closed up with nerves and she silently prayed to the goddess that this was it after all or would at least get Vivian to think about other dresses.

"Mom." They heard Vivian call. "How much do we have?"

"I'm sorry baby but only 500." Esme looked at the ceiling. "Oh moon...we are never going to find anything for that..."

The door opened and silently Vivian stepped out. She was like a dream in the lace dress and the way it hugged her body and slightly flared out from the hips made her body even more beautiful. What was best is that on one shoulder there was a strap and the other no strap, meaning she could have it either way. The sweat heart neck line showed only enough cleavage to make the dress have a slight sex appeal. Esme gasped and began to tear up, but not because she thought Vivian didn't like it, but because her daughter looked like a bride. "Oh baby...you are gorgeous."

Ava agreed, her cousin was stunning. Vivian silently continued to the mirrors, either shocked or scared, Ava didn't know, but her eyes were wide. She stood there for several minutes, just looking at herself.

"Is it ok?" Ava asked quietly.

Vivian's lip trembled and she looked at Ava before throwing her arms around her. "You saved my wedding, thank you so much!" Ava stood there for a couple moments in shock before hugging her cousin back. She was shocked that they dress actually worked. Vivian stepped back and with teary eyes ran her hands over the bodice of the dress, a smile slowly coming over her. "This is better than that silk one."

"Oh thank you!" Esme said in relief and turned to Beatrice. "How much is it?" Now Ava could feel the tension once again. If it was over the limit, she knew Vivian would kill some one and she feared for Beatrice. An alpha female was some times worse than her male counterpart.

"Well, that is a rental dress, but the girl and I already talked and I decided to sell it and since it is used, several times, I will only sell it for 350." Beatrice said proudly, like she was the one who fixed the problem.

Esme didn't need to be told twice and wrote the check and turned back to Vivian who was still admiring her new wedding dress. "If your father could see you, I know he would tell you that you are beautiful baby."

Vivian looked at her mother and smiled widely, wiping her tears away. "I am so happy. Thank you Ava, thank you so much."

After Vivian changed back into her clothes and they were on the way out, Beatrice stopped Ava and smiled sweetly. "Now darling, I don't know if you are from around her, but let me tell you, if you ever need a job, you come right here. You just did a miracle and I think you might have a talent."

Ava was shocked. Her help brides look for wedding dresses? She had never thought of it. "I'm not, but if I do move back...you will be one of the first to know."

* * *

Another night spent in the kitchen made Ava think that the room she stayed in was just for show. She really just lived in the kitchen.

But even with the cake partially finished, Ava had a hard time concentrating. He turned in the divorce papers. He really did it. Several times she could feel tears threaten her but she only reminded herself that this was her fault. She had begged him to let her go and now that he did...she could feel that part of her was missing.

Divorced...at 21. For no reason. What was her logic?

The door opened and Esme stepped in quietly, smiling at Ava when she looked up. "Thought you could use some help, if you would like."

Ava smiled back and shrugged. "Vivian helped me with the cupcakes."

"Which are beautiful. I see that you are almost done too. You know, I used to decorate cakes when I was Vivian's age, for a bakery in a grocery store. Maybe running inns and baking cakes are in the family." Esme stood across from Ava. "What you did today, at the dress shop, was very kind of you. I mean, gutsy to go up to an alpha with attitude, but I am glad you forced her to do that."

Ava shrugged and continued to fold fondant into a flower. "She needed a dress."

Esme could tell some thing was wrong with her niece but she didn't know how to approach her. "Did your mom really kill herself?"

Ava stopped and looked up at Esme, her lips pressed together. "Why?"

The older woman sat down in a chair and crossed her legs elegantly. "Well, you father was telling me about it before you got here. Broke his heart. He is still in love with that woman." She sighed and looked at the cake, lost in her thoughts about her poor brother Rudy.

"I can't see why, she was a horrible person. I hated her. Still do." Ava went back to her flower and set it on wax paper.

"She wasn't always terrible Ava. She just couldn't live life after she left New Orleans. She tried for a while, but some thing just died in her and she gave up, let it eat her. Her inner beast won. She needed to be with her goddess."

"She needed to quit being selfish." Ava mumbled and felt her anger that had been pent up starting to ooz out. "She had a wonderful husband and a daughter who loved her and it was never good enough."

"That, my love, is the pot calling the kettle black." Esme raised her brow. "You are doing the same thing to Bucky."

"The hell I am!" Ava slammed her hand down, smashing the flower she just created. "I left because I wanted her to be happy! I was too young to be married and I only got married because that woman told me too! For the family! I never got a reason why but I thought it would solve problems and it didn't! I love Bucky, I do! But I didn't marry him on the right terms, how is that fair to him?" Ava was almost screaming at her aunt and she felt her chest go up and down with each heavy breath. "Even if I did come back, what will it do? Dad doesn't live here, I don't know most of this pack and I have no friends here. And it doesn't even matter any more..." Ava let her hair fall over her face as she bent her head down.

"Ava Lene, how in the hell would it not matter any more? What are you talking about?" Her aunt sounded more concerned than angry, but Ava didn't want to look up.

"He turned in the papers...it's over." Ava's voice cracked and she clenched her eyes shut. "I thought that was what I wanted...but..."

Esme got up and went to her niece, placing her hands on her shoulders. "What papers, honey? What is over?"

Ava began to sob and held her fist to her forehead, not even trying to contain herself. "Bucky turned in the divorce papers this morning. That means he doesn't want to reconcile. I lost the love of my life. I'm just like my mom."

Esme was shocked. Bucky did what? She didn't even think he would do that, not ever. Bucky loved Ava and he would endure any punishment she could bestow on him. "Ave, where did you hear this from?"

"Gregory said so when I went upstairs. Even thinking about it breaks my heart." She tried to breath but her aunt hugged her tightly and rocked her gently.

"Do not listen to what those idiot jerks say. You don't know if that's true."

"I went to his house last night and he told me to come home and I said I couldn't. I think he gave up on me. I deserve it, I did this to myself." Ava clutched on to Esme and nuzzled her shoulder.

"Ava. We love you, very much. Me, you father, Vivian, Bucky...hell the Five miss their friend. You say you don't have anything to stay for, but I doubt you have anything to go back for." It was true. She didn't. "But you do what you need to do for you, not every one else ok. Now lets finish this cake and get you to bed before you collapse."

* * *

**A little more clarification on what happened and why she won't go home. I am not telling any one if Bucky really did turn in the papers or not. You will just have to read and see for yourself!**


	6. Let you go

**I am thinking this is the last one my pretties. Thank you for the reads and tagging. I am thinking of making a per-quell. Yup, of Bucky and Ava before, during, and at the end of their marriage.  
**

**Last we left off, we didn't know if what Greg said was true.  
**

**This will be cut up a little bit. Longer, but the parts won't be huge.**

* * *

She woke up in the kitchen, covered in once again in flour and anything else to make a cake. She could also smell others in there and now she could hear their voices. She groaned and picked her self off the floor, wondering why Esme would let her stay there.

"Well, looks like my little princess is up and ready to go." Her father stood by the counter, noticing her first. She groaned and held her head.

"What time is it?" She mumbled and lazily looked around the kitchen. The cake stood complete on the counter in front of her and her aunt had removed the cupcakes last night. It was ready. She thanked the moon.

"About 6:30. We have breakfast cooking and then you should probably go clean up." She saw Aunt Persia, a pack member she hadn't seen since she left many years ago.

"Persia, it's been so long." She smiled and the older woman smiled back. Ava couldn't believe how much older she looked, but it had been a long time since she had seen the elderly healer.

"Our tragic miracle girl is up. I would hug you but I am in my nice sweater, my child." She looked her up and down, regarding the good coat of flour.

The others in the kitchen smiled at her. Raul and the twins stood talking, bacon in everyone's mouths. Esme waved her to eat but she shook her head. "I am going to shower and then...I need some time alone." She ignored the questions and the odd looks and excited the kitchen. She needed to figure out if she was going to board the plane tomorrow or stay here.

* * *

The ground was moist, but not soaked. The evidence of yesterday's rain fall was beginning to vanish.

Ava sat, trying to remember what is was like to be part of a pack. She didn't know any more. Plus where would they put her? In her room that she stayed in now? No...every one lived in the houses around the inn or rented a room, but she knew that the room she stayed in was one of their best.

She sat on a rock, keeping away from the drying ground and letting a few rays of sunshine fall on her. This wasn't a life or death decision. Even if she went back to Canada and then came back here, they would settle for that. Esme said she needed to do what was best for her. But what was best?

She smelt a musky scent and heard the sound of boots crunching the fallen twigs that laid in their path. She sighed. One moment alone was what she asked for, just one. It was hard to escape some times.

"Your aunt wants you back at the inn, she says she has a surprise for you." Some one poked her shoulder and she hugged her knees tighter.

She laid her head the opposite way of the intruder and closed her eyes. "She can wait. Leave me alone please Bucky."

He came to stand in front of her and placed both hands on either side of her body, bringing him a little to close. "What is your problem today? Do you need a hug because I have these arms that are oh so comfy."

"You turned in the divorce papers." She whimpered.

He removed himself from her space and stood there. "Who told you that?" He asked quietly, his tone giving it all away.

She bit her lip and left her perch on the rock. "Doesn't matter." She picked up her shoes and began to walk quickly farther into the woods. She didn't want him to see her cry, not when he did what he thought she wanted. He didn't do any thing wrong...

He pursued her, running after her and easily matching her pace with his longer legs. "Hey, I asked you a question kid."

_Kid. _She thought sadly. He only called her that before they even started dating. He reverted back to her old name between them, instead of baby doll or baby girl, which he used when she was upset. "I said it doesn't matter."

"Yes it does because you ever told you that had no right, that was for you and I to talk about." He grabbed her arm gently and stopped her. "I thought it was what you wanted." He frowned and he suddenly looked older. Just like Persia looked older. Four years...he was almost 30 soon, but she couldn't remember any more.

She looked away and recoiled from him, holding her shoes to her chest. "Yeah, it was."

He looked surprised and she could see regret and hope in his eyes. Maybe it was just confusion. "Was? Oh moon you didn't chang-"

"No." She said quickly. "Not about that." She felt like she was lying, but she wasn't. At least that was what she believed; she had been wrong before though. "I just...forget it, you did the right thing." She began to walk away from him.

"You are lying and I hate it when you lie like that." He followed her and she tried to dodge him but he kept on her heels. "Is this what you want? To be wondering why you wake up alone every morning, to feel like you made the wrong choice? Do you want to be like your mother Ava? Is that your goal? You are succeeding."

She spun on her heel and slapped him, hard. His head only turned slightly and his eyes widened with surprise. She was even surprised and she stepped back, clutching her shoes tighter. When he reached up and touched his face, he looked at her with sadness. "Baby, I am so-"

"Don't ever call me baby again and you can go to hell. Like you are perfect!" She sniffed back her tears. Today was a happy day, today was her cousin's wedding. She was not going to let him ruin it for her. "Stay away from me." She took off back toward the inn, leaving him there in shock.

Served him right.

* * *

Ava heard everything that was going outside and the women trying to convince Vivian that she needed to stay in her room so no one saw her. Gabriel, she knew, was in for a treat.

She remained in her room after returned to the inn. She needed to be alone. But when she entered her room she found a dress bag and a note. She opened the bag to find a soft pink dress, one for Vivian's maid of honor. When she had picked up the note it read:

_I used to think you were just a know it all snob. Come to find out you do really care about others. I am glad you came, thanks for saving my wedding._

_-Viv_

Ava was happy that she was promoted from estranged cousin to savior. She laughed. She could solve everyone's problems but her own. After putting the dress on the bed she sat on the floor with a shoe box. In the box were pictures she had hidden in her stuff and left at Rudy's and hadn't been burned with the inn. She found it in the drawers of the vanity and she was unsure if she should open it.

She finally willed herself to open the box, slipping the lid lightly off and setting it next to her and tipping the box completely over and spilled the pictures all over the floor.

She shuffled through a few, seeing some of her and her mother, father, cousin, uncle Ivan and aunt Esme. She even found a few of pack events and weddings. Including her own.

The picture she found was of her in her simple dress and him in his simple suit. They didn't do anything big but it was perfect anyway. It was of them after they just walked back down the aisle and Bucky had leaned down and kissed her, both trying not to smile to wide. They were so happy...

She set it face down and looked for another, only finding one of her and Bucky at the old inn, with her on his back and his big grin and eyes covered with his 'manly' aviators and her in her way to big for her face sunglasses. She felt her heart drop to her gut and she remembered what he had said earlier. Like her mother...

No, she was not. She refused to be her mother and she knew what she had to do.

She drew a bath and scrubbed herself clean and used lilac bath salts to get rid of the smell of the forest. She was going to go down there and with her head held so high.

She was not going to let her problems ruin her cousin's wedding. She was going to enjoy it.

After she had cleaned herself, she dried her hair and let the natural waves stay instead of straightening it out, since it would futile anyway. She heard a knock and opened the door, standing there completely naked. Esme stood there with a bag and a wine bottle. "I have come to make you drop dead gorgeous maid of honor material, now let me in before some one walks by and sees you like that. Your daddy raised you better."

"And even though we are naked all the time and oddly he has seen me, it's still a taboo." Ava rolled her eyes and stood back to let Esme dance into the room. Esme was gorgeous herself. She was dressed in a strapless cream-colored cocktail dress and her hair was pulled up into an elegant and tasteful bun; she remained shoeless and walked as if she was dancing to a soundless tune.

She stepped over the pictures and ooh'd when she saw some face up. "Well, look it here. Oh you and Vivian in the tub!" Esme swooned. "I make good-looking babies. And your ok too." Esme picked up another one. "Oh and look at this," She flipped it around to show Ava. It was the one she had just sat down. "Look at this hot young couple."

Ava shook her head and walked over to her bag. "Haha, Esme."

Esme shrugged and put all the pictures in the box she saw. "He has a very nice ass." She giggled and left the box to set down the bottle of wine and set her little bag down which Ava assumed was full of make up. She wasn't really one for make up.

Ava scoffed and began to put her bra and underwear on. "Then why don't you tap it?" She asked sarcastically.

Esme gave her a dry look. "I am a mated woman and he is a mated man." She opened the wine bottle and took a large gulp. Esme loved her wine.

"Oh, he is?" Ava put her hands on her hips and raised her brow.

"Doesn't mean I didn't think about it. But I am a good auntie and I would not do that to my little Ava boo." Esme sung the last word and Ava had to contain her own laughs. Ava boo. How horrendous. Esme took her arm and sat her down in front of the mirror. "I'm not touching your beautiful hair, just your face and then you get in that dress and get downstairs. You have to see the set up."

Ava smiled and was glad to see her aunt all happy and excited, even if she was drunker than an NFL fan on Sunday. Esme shook her head and then opened her bag of 'surprises'. "So Bucky said you two had a pretty good spew this morning. Tell auntie Esme all about this so she can spread rumors." She found the eyeliner and Ava wondered if she would have her eyes after this.

"I really don't want to be in a bad mood right now." Ava said in a nicer voice, even though she knew she might have come off a little snotty.

Esme had her close her eyes and she carefully applied the eyeliner. "Well, I just want to know if I have to kick his ass or not. Get a beer in you and there will be no sorrow tonight."

Ava took a deep breath and pressed her lips together slightly. "He said I was like mom and that I was making a wrong choice." She sighed. "He did turn in the papers."

Esme cursed and shook her head. "Son of a bitch, I was hoping that was just something Greg was saying to piss you off." She could feel and smell the breath of her aunt when she pronounced the last words.

"I was thinking of trying again, you know and then...it is what it is." Ava said quietly.

After she was done with the eyeliner, Esme moved on to the eye shadow. "No, it isn't. You need to go down there and show him what a woman you are and that he was stupid."

Ava opened her eyes and looked at her aunt with confusion. "He did what I asked him too, it's my fault!"

Esme smirked and gave Ava a knowing look. "Men only do as their told when they know what might be in store for them. He knew you'd come running back if he did that. Just play his game and make him wage his tail."

Ava smiled back at her aunt and began to laugh. She was right. Bucky would do that if he thought it would make her run back to him. "Oh Esme, that is not how all men are."

"Are too, just you see."

* * *

Ava looked adorable in her dress with petite flats. She was supposed to wear heels but after many failed attempts at walking and not dying, Esme settled for the flats and left to go help down stairs again.

Ava followed shortly, enjoying seeing everyone in button ups and ties, dresses and slacks. The twins had their mother fidgeting over their shirts, begging them not to make asses out of them selves and Ulf being prepped by Esme. Everyone was talking animatedly about how exciting this was.

In the kitchen, Rudy, Gabriel, and Bucky were enjoying a beer with other pack men, laughing at a joke that some one had just told. When Rudy saw her he yelled out in joy and opened his arms. "There is my sweet heart and look how beautiful you are!" He gave her a large hug and patted her back. He smelt like beer, as did every male in the room. Along with cologne.

"Hey, cousin, come here and give me a hug." Gabriel grabbed her as soon as Rudy released her and gave her a half hug. "I want to thank you for helping my Vivian out. She was a mess, let me tell you." He patted her back. "You are more than welcome to stay here."

Rudy looked away and Bucky pretended not to hear it. No one knew if she was going to stay or not; it was tearing her father and Bucky up, she knew. _Do what is best for you._

"I am going to find Vivie, so I can help her do her...thing." Ava turned away and walked back the same way she came, avoiding eye contact with any one else so she wouldn't get caught in another conversation and end up answering questions she didn't know.

She found Vivian in the house behind Bucky's, where Esme, Jenny, and another girl her age, were going in and out off, keeping watch on the set up outside. Many white chairs were lined up in neat rows, an aisle down the middle was a wonderful white lane leading to a white arch covered in false white and light pink roses. Ava was surprised her cousin liked pink.

"There she is!" Esme smiled and waved Ava over. "I told you it was really pretty." She smiled and began to wiggle. "You should see her Ava."

Ava followed Esme into the house, dodging around the other girls who were trying to get ready. They all wore light cream dresses that flowed around them lightly like they were angels and their hair was down in waves like Ava's. Unlike her though, she doubted that they were natural.

Vivian was in her room, looking in the mirror on her dresser. Her hair was pulled loosely back and in a neat bun. The straw strands fell around her face, giving her face a beautiful gold frame. The dress still looked as beautiful as before and of course, Vivian copped out of the heels and chose bare feet. Ava almost laughed. How wolf like.

Vivian saw Ava and waved her into the room, shutting out everyone behind her. "They won't leave me alone." She shook her head as she closed the door. "And Esme is so drunk she can't see her toes."

Ava shrugged and remembered her own wedding. "You remember my wedding?" Esme had fallen over and uncle Ivan went to catch her, taking him with her and half of the decorations near them. Ava wasn't angry. It was funny after all. Rudy had to carry her back to the inn and put her in bed before she could injure herself any more.

"Oh moon! Don't you curse me!" She pointed at Ava and looked in the mirror again. "I mean your wedding was nice and all but I swear to the moon if Gabriel or my mom get that drunk I will kill." She growled and she shivered as her fur lightly ran across her skin.

"Oh Vivian, you will also be too drunk to notice." Ava sat on the bed, thinking twice about it and standing. She didn't know what Gabriel and Vivian did in that bed.

Vivian sighed and looked at the door, as if some thing was tearing her up inside. Ava kept looking at her cousin, wondering if Vivian was scared or was unsure of doing this. Vivian finally shook off what ever thought that was weighing on her and looked at the window. "The sun is going down."

"You'll be Mrs. Gabriel Dirigeant before sun set. Are you ready?" Ava turned and grabbed the head band that Vivian decided to wear instead of a veil. Tole did not look go with lace.

Vivian nodded and took the head band and placed it in her hair, making it look like she was crowning herself as queen. She turned back toward her dresser and picked up a picture that Ava instantly knew was of Vivian's father, Ivan. Ava turned her head away. That was a private moment for Vivian and she didn't want to intrude.

"I miss you daddy." Vivian placed a kiss on a face that would never be seen in this life again. Vivian didn't get the joy of having her father give her away at her wedding. It was one of the most fond memories Ava had of her father. Maybe she took him for granted more than she realized.

Vivian tucked the picture into her dress, keeping it with her and then looked at Ava with a determined face. "Ok, let's go get married."

* * *

"You did it on purpose."

"I did not! Vivian said I could choose who I wanted and I chose Bucky. The fact that she made you maid of honor is totally not my fault. If any thing you should go after her." Gabriel looked down at the short loup garou girl with a smile in his eyes. He really did do it on purpose.

Ava had snuck Vivian into the inn, where she was going to start her walk down the aisle with Rudy, with no one seeing her. She wanted Gabriel to be surprised. On her way back out and toward the set up, Orlando Griffin, who came for the occasion, called for the maid of honor and best man. To her shock and surprise, Bucky marched right over to the old wolf and Ava knew Gabriel had planned it. She swore on the moon! She hunted him down and found him standing by a mirror in one of the halls, trying to correct his tie. He only laughed at her accusation.

"You are a liar, Gabriel." She crossed her arms and look at him with defiance. She used to baby sit his sisters and they were always kind of friends, so she knew her boundaries, even though he was alpha now.

He feigned hurt and put his hand on his chest. "That is so mean of you to say Ava Lene."

She wanted to laugh. He was a big man, with a demeanor of a warrior, but for Vivian and her, he was a puppy dog that covered them with his sarcasm. "Whatever. Just know if he tries to pull this 'I miss you' crap on me, he is flying into that cake." She pointed at the table in which the said cake was perched on.

He held up his hands and shook his head. "Maybe you shouldn't be so stubborn and be with the man you love, but what do I know, uh?"

Oh, the bastard. She turned and walked away, her arms tightly crossed over her body and a full pout on her lips. They wanted her to suffer. She didn't want to talk to him. She didn't even want him to say he was sorry for this morning. She didn't want an apology.

"Hey Avie! You are looking mighty fine you lovely beast, you!"

She turned toward the cat calls, only to find the remains of the Five strolling after her. She groaned inside. Who else wanted their face torn to bits? She wanted to grow claws and swipe at them.

They looked ridiculous in tuxes and their sports coats. The twins didn't look to happy about their mother insisting on the matching ties and Gregory, as always, was to lanky to fit the sleeves and pant legs of his outfit. Ulf wriggled around, as if the material was burning his flesh. He looked like a damn worm.

"What evil have you come to bestow upon me now you awful gang of cretins." She scrunched her nose. Their cologne seemed awkward on them and she wished they would have stayed with the usual smell of the Earth thing they had going on.

Gregory smile and Ulf giggled. Finn pouted and nudged her with her shoulder. "You are as much of a cretin as we are you know."

"Yeah, you used to be fun and hang with us. What got stuck up your sweet ass?" Gregory tilted his head and Avie realized they were actually asking about why she was being so cruel.

She shrugged and blew her hair away from her face. "To tell you the truth, since I have gotten here all I have done is trying to explain to men why their existence is threatening mine."

Ulf looked at the twins who gave Ava a doubtful look. Williem looked like he was in pain. "Why don't you just do what Gabe said and stop being stubborn."

She was going to blow. Any minute, she was going to tear off their heads. "Because I have some things to deal with first."

"Oh yeah like what?" Finn sniffed and lip twitched.

Like what? "None of your business, know go away because I have to go make sure my cousin doesn't die before she gets down the aisle."

Why, why, why? Why? She asked herself. She had no reason, so why? Come home, go back to Bucky, have a family...become distant and pretend her husband or her children weren't there and dive deep into depression. Become her mother. No.

She couldnt' do that.

* * *

The crickets sang their song in the trees as everyone sat and waited for the music to start and for Vivian to start her way down towards her fiance, to be wed and become a wife.

Gabriel stood there, trying not to look nervous, but he was. He never thought he would get married and now here he was, waiting for her to come out that door.

Ava looked out towards the back, where everyone waited. Behind her was the other bridemaids and groom's men. Bucky was trying to make his usually messy hair to lay in a neat fashion, but it didn't work. He was avoiding her and Ava knew it and thanked the goddess. For some reason, she felt like she was out for blood tonight.

"Ok, Vivian is at the stairs in the lobby, best man and maid of honor, please get ready to start in a minute!" A woman called and Ava assumed it was Magda. She was the loudest female Ava had ever known.

Bucky slowly made his way over to Ava, who stood by the door, waiting for the word. He looked wonderful, but out of place. Dressing up wasn't his thing.

"You look beautiful." He said quietly, fidgetting slightly.

She wanted to be mean but she opted for kindness. "You look good too."

After another moment of awkward silence, Bucky leaned his head down and Ava could smell the beer he had drank earlier. She knew what was coming. "You are nothing like your mother. I know an apology won't help, but...I will let you go, so you can figure out whatever is holding you back."

That was not what she was expecting. She swallowed and held her head high. "You already turned in the divorce papers."

"Actually, not yet. I signed them. I chickened out last minute. I didn't really get to talk earlier about that, due to my asshole behavior." He sighed and Ava closed her eyes as his breath fluttered over her face. Even with the smell of beer, she liked that feeling.

Before she could respond, some one yelled behind them and Bucky held out his arm for her to take. His smile soothed her slightly. She hated crowds.

As soon as she took his arm, he opened the door and one of the twins held it open as they stepped out, people in the chairs turning as they did.

A strange sense of deja vou made Ava hum slightly, like she was trying not to say something. Bucky's other hand touched her hand and rubbed her knuckles. She could almost hear him: _Don't get nervous now pip squeak._ They kept onto their way down the aisle, slowly.

As they made their way, other's following, she kept trying to answer the questions, but something deep down was holding her back. Her mother, that was all she could think about was her mother.

But Bucky still wanted her and her family would welcome her back. Did she have to leave? Yes...she had to do it. She had to go home, the one where she belonged. Away from people, so she couldn't hurt them any more.

When they stopped, they parted and went their ways to the sides. Ava stood there, with her small bouquet of flowers, the others following her and standing at attention, waiting for the bride. The music was also tasteful, since is was soft violins and not organs blasting. She hated organs.

Jenny's little girl stepped out of the door. She was a cute little thing and Ava knew she had practiced because she walked straight down the aisle, tossing the petals in clumps. She heard some of the women swoon.

The music changed and every one stood. Out of the corner of her eye she watched Gabriel shift his stance and straighten up. Just because he was the alpha didn't mean he couldn't be nervous or excited for his bride to come out of those doors.

And when she did Ava thought he would cry. She stood on the porch, with Rudy at her side. She looked like a goddes in her dress and the way she was posed made her look even more beautiful. She saw Bucky pat Gabriel's back in approval.

Vivian's eyes though, were only set on one person, and that was Gabriel. She was holding back tears, but her smile wavered, as if she was trying not to laugh out of joy. Finally, the love of her life was here. No more pain and sorrow.

When Vivian and Rudy stopped, Orlando Griffin smiled and asked who gave Vivian away. Rudy puffed up with pride and said: "Her mother and I."

When Rudy kissed her cheek and handed her over to Gabriel, the crowd was asked to sit down.

* * *

**Yes I lied...there will be one more chapter after this, but come on! This one is longer than the rest!**

**Enoy and please review!**


	7. That Tile Has to Go

**This is really it! I swear this is the last one!**

**Beta-ed: By ItaSaku1 **(if there are any mistakes that I have missed I apologize profusely.)

* * *

The personal vows weren't very long. Neither of them were slathered in sappy promises or anything that would make someone roll their eyes in disgust. There were no promises that would not be kept.

It reminded Ava of when her and Bucky said their vows, how they were full of 'I will never fight with you' and 'I promise to listen'. Those were broke the next day when she found him trying to smoke in their new house, after he said he wouldn't. Even the Five didn't cross her path that day.

When it came time to exchange the rings, Ulf appeared from behind Bucky and held them both out. Ava was not surprised to see that Gabriel's ring was made from a dark tungsten and it was large in comparison to the other. Vivian's ring though, was very pretty. A round diamond was set in platinum and was flanked by two triangular blue diamonds, which resembled Gabriel's eyes. It was an excellent pick for her.

Both parties took the rings they got for each other and held them as Orlando Griffin said something in French. It was an old loup garou mate pact and traditionally it was said in French or German. Ava did her's in Russian since that was where her mother came from. It was very sacred among their kind and was held higher than any vow they could write for each other.

Ava recognized one part: '_Aussi longtemps que la lune brillera, pour vous, je vais hurler pour votre amour et mon coeur appartient à vous et aux vôtres pour moi.' _As long as the moon shall shine, for you, I will howl for your love and my heart will belong to you and yours to me. She looked over to see Bucky with his eyes narrowed at the ground in front of his feet. Was he wondering why that pact failed them? She looked away as he looked up at her and she tried to concentrate on her cousin and her groom.

When they slipped on their rings Orlando Griffin spoke once more. "The moon has given us this blessing as we celebrate our alphas making the sacred pact of marriage. Brothers and sisters, I give you Mr. and Mrs. Gabriel Dirigeant, your alpha pair!" And with that he tilted back his head and raised a howl at the moon as it began to rise over them. Others followed with cheers and howls and Gabriel triumphantly held up Vivian's hand as they turned to face their pack. Vivian's smile was radiant and Ava could tell her cousin was beginning to cry with joy. She did it. She was married.

* * *

The lights around the inn and the set up with twisted lights in shapes of flowers illuminated the place as the pack wondered around, talking amongst themselves or to their newly wedded alpha's, who were getting ready to cut their cake. Esme was standing with Rudy and Tomas, dabbing her eyes as she watched her daughter start a new life.

The pack was starting to gather around the table where the cake stood with cupcakes. People whispered praise over how beautiful the cake was and Ava kept quiet. She would bask in it silently. The two alphas where caught up in each other and making jokes and exchanging loving kisses.

Ava felt something touch her arm and she looked to see Bucky standing next to her, hands in his pockets and looking at the table. "That is a pretty cake you made kiddo."

She smiled and whispered thanks. She didn't want to argue right now and especially with so many nearby. She stood silently, hoping that he would go away and they could talk later. It didn't seem the case. "Ava Lene, can I ask you one favor and if you say no you might kill the heart that keeps me alive."

"No pressure." She shook her head. How melodramatic.

He stood closer to her, but he was more behind her than anything. She could feel the heat of his body searing her back and neck and she contained a shiver as his breath fluttered against her neck. "Can we pretend, for one more night, that things never changed? Can we be in love for one more night? That is all I am asking."

The both remained quiet as people cheered on the couple at the table as they cut the cake together. When they finally had their respectable pieces, the Five began to urge Vivian to smash the cake in Gabriel's face.

Gabriel gave Vivian a warning look and she responded with: "Get it on my dress and tonight there will be no 'after wedding bliss'." He only laughed as her and picked up the piece to put it in her mouth. Vivian copied his moves and slowly urged the cake toward his mouth. They almost made it...until Vivian smashed a cupcake into the side of Gabriel's face. Others laughed and Vivian laughed with a mouth full of cake as Gabriel smeared some frosting on her cheek, only to lick it off.

How happy they were. She was like that. Why not have one more night of what used to be? It wouldn't be hard; she's just having to leave tomorrow. And leave him behind. She bitterly chastised herself for being so outrageously fearful.

"Ok." She whispered and she felt Bucky move behind her.

"What did you say?" He was surprised, by the sound of his voice and Ava didn't blame him. After this morning's argument, it didn't seem very likely for her to agree to anything.

She turned and looked up into his eyes. They weren't the blue that Gabriel had, which were dark ocean pools. They were of ice and winter and they bore into her face with want and desire. "I said I will do it. But you have to remember I leave tomorrow."

He smiled sadly and nodded. He brought his hand up and rested it on her neck. "I know baby, I know."

She returned his smile and felt her heart pound in her chest as he bent down and pressed his lips against her's. He cupped her face and she felt herself relax and smile against him. She didn't need to pretend. She could give him real love tonight.

"Hey! You two are gross! Quit it!"

The stopped and pulled away from each other and looked to see Gabriel standing only a few feet from them, grin wide and Vivian next to him giving Ava and knowing look.

Bucky hugged Ava by the shoulders and laughed at his friend. "Welcome to the 'boring married people club', you can be president."

Gabriel patted Bucky's back and it shook Ava as well. She placed a hand on Bucky's chest to keep her steady. Vivian stood in front of her cousin and smiled. "So you were right after all."

Ava gave her cousin a cocky glare and pursed her lips a bit. "Duh, I am the older one and by far the most talented."

"Whatever!" Vivian rolled her eyes and pushed Ava playfully. "But being serious, thanks for your help. I really needed it and I don't think my mom could have handled anymore." Vivian looked behind her to the said woman, who was dancing with Tomas and laughing at something Renetta had come over to say to the couple.

Gabriel stood by his new wife and wrapped his arm around her. "Ava, I know you hate us and all, but if you ever come home, you can stay here and work here and moon, you can even beat up the Five. But," His face grew serious and Ava knew that she was in for some older brother love. That was what Gabriel always did to her. Joke and then chew her out. "If you go, you will break a lot of people's hearts. You are family and don't ever think you never were." He patted her shoulder and then turned with Vivian to go to the dance floor that had been set up outside.

"Good ol' Gabe, he knows how to throw verbal punches." Ava shook her head and sighed. Bucky kissed her temple and led her over to the dance floor. The song was an old country song that uncle Ivan used to sing around the inn and occasionally she remembered Bucky whistling it in the morning before he left to give touring hikes. It went along the lines of loving your woman and being a good man. It made Ava remember the best and she fell easily into a slowly sway with Bucky, since he didn't really dance.

She kept her distance, as much as he would allow and tried to ignore the loving gaze he was giving her. She was going to blush if he didn't quit it. But then again why was that a bad thing? _I am rusty at this. I wonder if he is too. _Doubt it.

"You know, I always liked it when you wore your hair down but my favorite was when you made that massive nest on top and called it a bun." He touched a strand of hair and chuckled lightly.

She shrugged and looked down at her tresses. "You try having this much hair and it being so hot. Maybe I should cut it off." She mumbled the last few words.

Bucky's face grew an expression that was both fear and amusement. Ava almost laughed at him. "Please don't. You would look like a guy and I really don't like guys."

"I have boobs." This joking around was making her happy and fluttery. Inside her wolf wanted to run with glee and suddenly she felt her fur grow lightly on her arms.

"And they are beautiful but please, I've always loved your hair." He laid a sweet kiss on her nose and she scrunched her face with the act. When he pulled back she put her nose on his jacket and rubbed, causing protests from him. "You brat, knock it off."

But she kept her face in his chest and inhaled deeply, taking in the smell of his sweat, cologne, and the smell of cigarettes. Usually, bar soap or car grease replaced the cologne, but he still had that special smell to him.

Bucky stopped dancing when there was a tap on his shoulder and they both looked to see Rudy standing there with a wide smile on his face. "That is an very pretty girl you got there Dideron."

Bucky smiled down at Ava and held her tight to him. "I think so too."

Ava blushed and looked away, as if she wasn't involved with this conversation. Rudy chuckled and nodded toward his daughter. "May I steal her for a few moments? I know you need nicotine as much as the next chain smoker."

Bucky frowned in thought and looked at Ava. She shrugged and looked at Rudy. "I forgot about having one actually." Bucky admitted and let her go, his arms replaced with her father's. She hadn't been this close and it not be awkward forever. It was nice though, to have a few moments with him.

Bucky wondered off and Rudy, who had more experience with dance, lead Ava around in a slow waltz. She looked around to see most of the usual couples dancing and enjoying themselves. Gabriel and Vivian were in the center of course and the Five danced with family members or younger pack mates.

"Last time I danced with you it was at your wedding and you were shaking so bad because you were scared to be on your own." Rudy said from above her head and she turned back to see him looking at her in thought. "I was very reluctant to let my baby girl go."

She patted his arm and gave him a reassuring smile. "I know you were daddy." She was reluctant to go like she did, but her mother insisted that she would be fine.

He sighed and nodded, letting a deep sound come from the back of his throat in agreement. "I still am reluctant. I know you are tired of hearing this and everyone keeps saying it but, you need to come home and I'm about ready to pull my fatherly authority over you and demand it. Not just for them but for you." His words were pleading and she felt knots well up in her gut and throat.

"Maybe someday, but not now." She couldn't look him in the eye when he did this; he would win if she did.

He didn't say anything and just continued to lead her around in their aimless dance. Ava wanted to hide. Come home, they all said, we miss you. Some she knew it was because they were close to Bucky, others were friends and family. She had a life here.

Why?

She shook her head and looked down, biting her lip to keep from asking out loud. Rudy hugged her close as the song ended and just in time for Bucky to come sauntering back, a seductive look on his face. "That moon is so full, I'm afraid it will burst."

Ava could tell too, because her bones ached for the change and her teeth poked the inside of her mouth. She wanted to run after the moon, beside her family tonight.

Others around them nodded and the two alphas were already beginning to shed their clothes. It was time to run. No more human bodies. Skin would be replaced with fur, nails with claws, and words for howls. Ava's eyes glowed a bright blue, staring at the moon like a moth did to a light.

Gabriel and Vivian bolted past the others, naked as they were born, their howls echoing around the trees as they entered them. The Five followed and soon after the rest of the pack finished shedding their clothes and running toward the trees like something was chasing them. Gabriel's sisters yipped and stumbled over each other.

Bucky took off his shirt and slid off his shoes, looking at Ava with blue eyes and a pointy grin. "You still think you are faster than me?"

She shivered and her spin cracked with sweet pain. She returned his grin and shook her dress off her body. "Thinking and knowing are totally different things." She let the sentence end with a groan as her arms elongated. Before he could respond she fell on all fours and took off in a sprint, leaving him struggling with his pants and calling protests.

She could smell the damp earth and all the creatures that scurried away from the approaching predators. Her small, lithe body flashed in between trees and left ghostly impressions in the ground. She was nothing but a blur in the trees and she turned sharply. He enjoyed a challenge.

After several minutes at full speed, she stopped and trotted to a small stream, her thirst driving her toward the water. She only had a few laps of water before something nipped at her tail. She yipped in surprise and turned to come face to face with a grinning Bucky. She huffed and laid her ears flat. What a pest he could be. She pounced on him and caught an ear between her teeth.

It must have shocked him because he partially changed back and she followed suit, giggling as she straddled him. He didn't look very amused though and he held her at arm's length. She noticed a slight tremor in his arms and hands.

She frowned and laid her hands on his chest, trying to get closer. "What's wrong?"

He was taking deep breaths and he swallowed thickly. "I can't be rough. I can't trust myself." His words were forced and his grip only loosened slightly. She slipped off him and let him sit up, a regretful look on his face.

She reached over and touched the scars on his neck; he tensed but did not shove her away. "Is it because of these?" She asked quietly. Since she had seen them, her curiosity had been spiked, but scars were not uncommon with her people.

He looked away sadly and closed his eyes, taking her hand gently and removing it from his neck. "I would defiantly lose you if I told you."

Ava shook her head. "I doubt it. You have done a lot of stupid things and I didn't leave." She nuzzled his shoulder. "You can tell me. Remember, we are supposed to act like nothing ever happened." She took his head and rested it on her lap, stroking his hair lightly. "Right?"

"I killed Jean."

Her hands froze and her mouth fell open. It would explain why Bucky's usual side kick wasn't around but she assumed he stayed back in Maryland with her father. But why? Why would a man kill his friend? "How?"

He kept his eyes closed and with self-hate he explained the Ordeal and how he and Jean were part of the final four. "I gutted him like a pig. My best friend since I started with this pack became a corpse in the ground, because of me. The other guy grabbed me and shook me a good one and that is how these scars came to be. I won't forgive myself. It was harder without you because I was so alone."

She didn't know how to respond. When someone spoke of the dead and it being their fault, there was truly nothing one could say to make the other feel better. "I am here now."

"But you are gone tomorrow and I will be without you once again. I keep thinking that maybe you will come back. Stupid, isn't it?" He stared up at her with sad eyes and she blinked back the tears.

She shook her head and her hair fell like a curtain around them. "No. I can't explain it...it's like it isn't the right time and...I want it to be right next time I get married. I want to do it because I want to and not because someone told me too."

"You should have done that in the first place." He sounded bitter and it was like he was spitting the words at her.

She lifted her head and looked around at the trees. She knew he was right. "I would have anyway. But not at 16. I always believed, since we began this relationship, that you were the one. I wish it was different. I wouldn't be so hurt about leaving you and so afraid of staying."

"You are afraid of your mother." He sat up and faced her. "But you are not her."

She smiled sadly. "That is why I am leaving. I won't put you through what she did to dad. I'll come back. Please, I don't want to end the night like this."

He kept his eyes on her and watched her through thick lashes. Besides Gabriel, he had some of the bluest eyes Ava had ever seen. They scared her and comforted her. "How do you want it to end then?"

How did she want it to end...she said she would pretend like nothing changed, like they were in love again. They were still in love, but there was one thing she wanted the most and she knew he craved it too. She leaned towards him and her eyes glazed over. Her body produced a suggestive tang and his nostrils flares and his own musk became heavy. "Like this..." She kissed him and he quickly took over, pushing her mouth closer with a hand in her hair. Soon they were in the leaves, tangled in each other's limbs, whispers turning into something more intimate and deep. Skin that was rough had turned to silk and kisses were more than lips meeting.

She had missed this. Being a lone for so long and longing for the touch that made a side of her she kept away only for him, it was like enjoying the kill after the chase. She wanted to tear his flesh from him with her teeth and claws and often she found herself howling at the moon with joy and pleasure and she smiled at the thought of the moon goddess blessing them. Lovers together at last.

Nothing on the earth was like making love to the one who truly owned your heart.

* * *

"Ava! Ava! Come on!"

Her eyes snapped open and she found herself squinting from the light that peered through the canopy of the trees, which sway slightly to the breeze.

"Ava!" She sat up and looked around. The voice was far away but she knew who it was. It was more than a voice and she wondered what time it was. Her eyes widened and she shot up on to her feet. Her plane!

She looked to see Bucky waking up from the sounds of the voices. He groaned and looked up at her with tired eyes. "What time is it?"

She shook her head and bit her lip. He smelt so good at the moment. She had to hold herself back from repeating last night's activities. He stood up and stretched, a few bones cracking back into place. She looked away. How tempting. "We have to go back."

He slouched slightly and his face remained blank. He was trying to show his disappointment. "Yes, I know."

They stood there for only a few more seconds until Bucky closed the gap between them and took her head in between his hands, pressing his mouth to her's. When he pulled back and stared into her eyes, as if it was truly the last time he would see her. "You will always be my wife. If I have to wait 1 million years to have you back, I will wait that long because you are worth it. I love you Ava. You never forget that."

She placed her hands on top of his and nodded as much as his grip would allow. When he let go she felt like something tore out of her and she wanted to reach out to him and touch him. She balled her fists so she wouldn't.

She followed him back to voices and found it was Vivian, Gabriel, and Rudy calling for her. Esme was probably still lying in bed with a headache. Bucky stopped and picked up what she identified was her underwear. She didn't remember being so close to the tree line when she undressed. He must have guessed her thoughts because he explained. "I moved them closer after you took off. Habit." He shrugged. She didn't complain. The Five liked to tease her about her nakedness, even thought it was not an uncommon thing to her people.

When she had herself mostly covered she ran to the porch where the newly wedded couple stood and her father looking behind her with disapproval. He still wasn't used to it after years.

"You have one hour to get cleaned up, get packed and then get in my car, because your flight leaves in two hours. What the heck where you doing out there?" Rudy crossed his arms and Ava felt like she was sixteen all over again. A child in trouble.

She didn't have time to answer because Bucky walked past her and onto the porch, talking for her. "It was because we ran and I left my watch in my pants. She can be ready in an hour." The two men exchanged saddened expressions, understanding what the other was feeling.

Vivian stared at her cousin with a blank expression while her husband sighed and nodded toward the door. "You better go get ready." Maybe they were hoping that Bucky kept her too late and she would have missed her flight after all.

Vivian's mouth tightened and she moved from his side. "I'll help her."

Ava and Vivian made their way through the inn and up the stairs silently, but Ava knew that her cousin had something to say, but she hoped that it wasn't a beggar's plea.

Vivian pulled Ava's clothes from drawers and the wardrobe, piling them on the bed while Ava scrubbed herself free of dirt and the night's previous activities. She found herself feeling heavy hearted and Bucky's words ran through her head a million times. _You will always be my wife. If I have to wait 1 million years to have you back, I will wait that long because you are worth it. _She stopped the trembling in her hands by gripping the soap and scrubbing harder.

When she emerged from the bathroom she saw Vivian sitting on the bed next to the pile of clothes and belongings, the box of pictures in her hands. "Uncle Rudy didn't bring these. I did."

Ava nodded and went to the pile, keeping her eyes away from the girl. Vivian continued. "I thought if you saw how much you were in love and how lucky you were, you'd come back and stay with your family. I don't know if I was to hopeful or stupid." She spoke with an angry mouth. "Rudy let you go and you are an adult he understood, but Bucky didn't. You don't know what it is like when you are not around."

Ava frowned and puffed up slightly. She had enough of people telling what she needed to do with her life. She wasn't going for it any more. "You've hated me for years Vivian, you even let people push me around when we went to school when I stood up for you and you blamed me for all the stupid thing Axel did. You didn't even recognize me as your cousin till now. Now it is like I was your favorite family member? Where the hell do you come off saying something like that?"

"Because I am the only one who hasn't said anything yet!" Vivian stood up and held up the picture of Ava and Bucky. "I never liked you and I really appreciate the help you did with the wedding but you have hurt everyone around you trying to not be your mother. You are being like her right now and if you leave, I swear to the moon, you'll kill him this time. Don't tell me that last night you were all innocent. You love him."

Ava scoffed and crossed her arms. "So now that you are married you think you can give advice?"

Vivian set the picture down and took a deep breath, steadying herself. "I am just stating what you already know and what will happen when you leave. You have no idea how much he needed you when Jean died and how lonely he has been. You didn't see what happened, I did. You want to know how long he looked for you? How long he kept his ring on his finger until he realized you were never coming back? I don't understand why he didn't go through with the divorce; you don't deserve him or this pack if you leave again."

"Vivian you have no idea what you are talking about." Ava was getting more than angry. She was a cornered animal. "My mom needed me. I left for her and she killed herself anyway. I didn't want to leave him, but I had to. You don't know what it is like to see your parents not be in love or to watch your mother wither away and die before her body does. I can't come home yet because I can't do that to him. I want to do it right when I come back."

Vivian looked very much like Esme at the moment, with her calm face, but the fury in her eyes. "I don't think you need to leave to help yourself. I think if you left it would make it worse. Your mom did some awful things to you and your dad, but please, don't do it to him, mom, or Uncle Rudy any more. If you have to go, let him go to and this time, all the way." She walked past Ava and flew out the door. Ava felt as if she had been torn a new one.

* * *

The car rumbled softly as Rudy continued to push his and Ava's bags into the trunk. Bucky, Esme, Tomas, the Five, and the newlyweds watched from the line of the parking lot with blank stares and solemn faces. Bucky stood there, as if nothing was happening and that his worst nightmare wasn't coming true.

Esme was the first to hug Ava good bye and wish her luck. The Five gave halfhearted hugs and good byes while Gabriel repeated that she was welcome back any time for any reason. Vivian only nodded, despite Esme's frown. Ava stood there, in front of the inn, wondering why this felt so wrong. If she chose to stay it would be wrong too.

Bucky reached into his pocket and clutched something in his hand, coming closer to her and taking her hand. He dropped something in her palm. "I can't keep this laying around. You take it and don't forget what I said."

She looked down to her palm to see her wedding ring staring up at her, cleaned and ready. The small white gold band was cold against her hot palm and the diamonds set in the star/ flower shaped setting shone brightly. She felt her throat close up and she looked back up at Bucky with teary eyes. "I can't take this."

He nodded and took her face between his large hands and kissed her softly. "Maybe I'll come see you."

She shook her head and tucked her hair behind her ear. "No, not until I get this right."

He let her go and she felt that pain again of losing a part of her. He stepped back and let her get in the car, Rudy silently waiting for his daughter. She looked back down at her hand and sighed when she saw the ring again. Out of curiosity she slipped it on and it was like itching a scratch that she couldn't reach. It still fit.

"You ready baby?" Rudy asked from the driver's side and Ava snapped out of her daze.

She stared at him, looking at the lines of his face that were not familiar to her any more. He was aging and she could see the bitterness in his eyes at having to take her to the airport. She felt her breathing increase and she dug her nails into her palms. "Daddy, even after all the things she did...after taking me with her and leaving you twice...if mom came back, would you forgive her?"

Rudy seemed stunned by her question and it took him several minutes to answer her. "Yes I would."

Ava gaped and shook her head. "But she was awful to you."

Rudy smiled sadly and took her hand between his. "Yes, but I loved her very much. I let her go because she wasn't happy. I am letting you go for the same reason."

"But I am not happy." She was shocked by her statement. She wasn't happy. She didn't want to go back, she didn't want to leave. She wanted to stay. If she left, she would turn into her mother after all, as Vivian told her. She was right. She began to shake and turned quickly and opened the door, ignoring Rudy's questions. She stumbled out and it caught the attention of Gabriel and Bucky, who stood together a few feet away from the car.

Bucky frowned and turned back toward her. "You forget something?" His frowned deepened when he saw the ring on her finger.

She shook her head and wiped her sweaty palms on her shorts. Her heart beat quickened. "That tile in the bathroom is ugly. I hate it." She said quickly and Gabriel seemed confused. Bucky understood.

"Ok." He said unsure of why she said that but he crossed his arms and waited for her to continue. Rudy got out of the car and looked over at his daughter. Esme touched Tomas's arm, as if something awful was happening.

"And the bedroom needs brighter colors and that spare room needs to be cleaned out. So daddy has his own room when he stays." She felt the tears well up again and she tried to hide them. "But that tile has to go."

Bucky stood there confused. His lips hardened and his eyes blinked in thought. "Why are you telling me this?"

She finally let the tears begin to roll and Bucky's face softened. She wiped the treacherous tears away and cleared her throat. "Because I don't want to have to look at it all the time. I don't want to wake up in the morning and walk into the bathroom and see it. Would ruin my whole day."

Bucky's arms dropped and the Five perked up. Gabriel went to Vivian's side, seeing that it was not his place to share this moment. Rudy sighed in relief and Esme hugged Tomas and whispered thanks to the goddess. But Bucky stood there. Would he forgive her, like her father would have to her mother? "And...I want to marry you again...and this time I am picking out my damn dress."

She wasn't able to say anymore because he moved towards her so quickly it took her a moment to figure out if she was engulfed in his arms. She clung to him. This was what she wanted. Him. Her husband. Her family and her home. It was what she needed. She let her tears roll and he would never tell her or any one, but she knew he was crying too. Suddenly he let her go and stepped back, taking even breaths. "Say it."

She looked at him confused. He nodded. "Say what you mean."

She smiled and shrugged, holding her arms away from her body slightly. "I'm not going back." After she said those words the Five raced towards them and produced a wave of hugs and hollers. Finn handed Gregory a wad of money and rolled his eyes. She would get angry with them later, but she just wanted to enjoy them right now.

Esme saved her from the boys and hugged her once more. Vivian even came and gave her the hug, before saying: "I was going to pull you out of the car. Good thing I didn't have to."

Even Gabriel gave her a large hug and patted her back. He was too big for her and she almost fell when he tapped her. When all of them had voiced their happiness of their return, Bucky grabbed her again and took her hand with the ring. He slid it off and she blinked in confusion and opened her mouth to protest until he dropped to one knee. She froze and she heard Esme clap her hands.

"Ava Lene Revoux-Dideron, I want to marry you again too, but you have to promise me that once this ring is on your hand, you will never take it off again." He held up the ring and looked up at her with questioning eyes.

She stared at it like it was the most difficult question of her life. She didn't remember what is was like being a wife or part of a pack. But wouldn't be hard to learn again would it?

She nodded and looked at him with a large smile. "I suppose I can do that for you."

* * *

**DONE! Man that took a long time and peeps...the ending was hard to write because I had no idea how to end it in the first place. But I am excited to announce that there will be a prequel! Yay! So far it will be called What the Fire Took from Us. This is a year before the fire took place, if not two and will be much, much longer.**

**Thank you for all who read and reviewed!**

**-Jane**


End file.
